Hey, it's Calum... [Cashton]

Entry 7

Blurry - Puddle of Mudd

Hey, it's Calum...

Remember how I said I thought I was getting better? 

Well, I lied. 

I just took a shower and.. red. 

All I saw was red. All I see now is red. 

I cut everywhere I could think of. 

Calves, thighs, arms, shoulder, etc. 

I almost fell asleep in the shower. 

That would have been bad. 

Imagine if one of the guys saw me. I don't think they could handle it. 

It would be such a shock to them. They would freak out and hate me more than they already do. 

But I managed to get out and dry myself off. 

I could barely walk to my room though. 

I think I hit a vein. 

My arm really hurts. 

Like not just where I cut. It hurts all the way up into my hand as well. 

I'm in so much pain but I don't care. I kind of like it. 

I don't want anyone to take it away from me. 

I like being in control. 

Uh oh. 

I'm shaking. 

I feel dizzy... 

kinda sleepy.. 

I think I'm gonna sleep.. 

yeah.. 

sleepy Cal....

um......

Save me Ash.

Love always,

Calum