Phan Oneshots

Stitching Up the Seams

Summary: Phil can't help but notice the boy with dead eyes who wears baggy jumpers all the time and barely talks anymore. Not being able to stand how sad he looks, Phil begins to slip notes into Dan's locker in hopes of raising his spirits.
Warnings: Implied self harm (doesn't describe it at all, just implied), cussing, depression

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There is a boy with mocha hair and caramel eyes that turn slightly mahogany in the sun who has a dimple in his pale cheek and has long fingers that shake slightly whenever he talks or even when he reaches for things or writes. There is a boy with dark circles under his eyes who comes to school sometimes with curly hair and wears baggy sweaters that he constantly pulls over his hands like he's nervous about something.

Phil didn't know what he was nervous about.

There is a boy who misses school for days and comes back with eyes the colour of charcoal and the absence of a smile, who doesn't talk for three days until he is forced to by teachers who are worried about him. He always says the same thing, with an unconvincing grin and a dismissal in the form of a shaky hand: "Im okay."

For some reason, this is enough for the teachers, but Phil doesn't buy one bit of it. Perhaps he knows from personal experience from year 7 when his best friend had been involved in a car crash and passed away too early, or maybe it was just common knowledge that smiles should not be that forced and that happy people do not have anything to hide under baggy sleeves.

Maybe this is the reason that Phil finds himself taking out a piece of paper and his favourite blue pen, scrawling down word after word before folding it into a perfect square.

'Has anyone ever told you that your eyes are the colour of cinnamon on Christmas day? You are so very beautiful and I hope you are having a wonderful day, my friend. x'

He knows the brown haired boy by the name of Dan Howell, and asks the school's office for the number of Dan's locker, stating that Dan had asked him to get a book he had forgotten out of it, but forgot to tell him the locker number. Surprisingly, it worked, and he found locker 2156 fairly easily.

As it was after school, and nearly everyone was gone, Phil had no trouble slipping the paper into Dan's locker. He smiled proudly at himself as he walked away, praying that this would make that dimple come to life and those brown eyes brighten just a little bit, because Dan really was beautiful but he was sad and no one deserved to force a smile upon their face.

"Why are you so cheerful?" Phil's mum asks when she calls him down for dinner, reaching over to rustle her hand through his black fringe. He leans into her touch, not understanding why kids his age - seventeen - always seemed so regretful to show their mother some affection.

"Nothing much," Phil answered despite his obvious glowing attitude. He couldn't wait to see Dan's reaction the next morning. "I just really hope I can help this person. They're sad and I don't know why so I left a nice note for them in their locker."

"That's very nice of you, Phil. I've raised you well." His mum brought him into a large hug, kissing his forehead in a way that made him feel proud of himself.

He couldn't wait for tomorrow.

Except, Dan wasn't there the next day. Or the next. Or the day after that.

Phil felt unease growing in the pit of his stomach (along with disappointment) when a full week passed and Dan was no where to be found. He had even resorted to asking his friends - "Do you know where that Dan Howell kid is?" - but the only response he was met with was blank stares and Chris asking who the hell that was.