Anything Can Happen

Chapter Twelve

Louis POV

That feeling we got as a kid when we arrived home after a long day, whether it be from school or work, and all we wanted was for our parents to be there for a hug, and to squeeze any problems or worries out from our bodies. But instead, we came home to an empty house, with only ourselves and the empty air that surrounded us. That feeling of being unwanted, and alone, and having to cry by ourselves, without anyone to comfort us. We became furious as to why no one was with us in our time of grief, and thought how ironic it is that we're always alone when we need somebody the most.

That feeling we get, when we feel alone and useless .... It's the most unpleasant feeling.

In society, all we want is to be accepted. We want someone around us who will continuously make us feel loved, and like we belong. We crave that feeling, and once we get it? We get hooked. Hooked on the feeling of constantly having a certain pair of eyes looking into our hearts, and loving every second of that attention we receive. Therefore, we fall in love. Not only do we fall in love with the feeling of being loved, but, obviously, the person giving us their all. We fall for their unique personality, which could be similar to another's, but they somehow manage to pull it off better than anyone else. We fall for the simple things, whether it be the sound of their laugh, or the way they look away from the TV screen when they are aware that a scary scene is soon approaching.

And then, we imagine life with this significant other. We picture what it would be like waking up every morning with their arms draped in ours, and each others legs tangled with one another's. We wonder if we can see a future with our other half. The moment when we start to have these kinds of thoughts, we get attached. We think over and over again about how amazing it would be spending the rest of our lives with such an outstanding person, and that we can't imagine life without them.

So, in the moment that plan changes, and completely blind sides us? We not only get heartbroken, but also set off track.

I fell this way for Harry, and have been a mess each and every single day since we, or I, called things off.

I grew this attachment towards Harry that I never thought I could ever have for anyone else. I would imagine a dream life with him, where we lived in the dream home, in our dream city. I put too much effort and time into thinking about our future, that I couldn't sit and enjoy the present we were living in together.

In the one "official" week of Harry and I being broken up, all I've been doing is laying around. It's December twentieth, and the school semester ended on the sixteenth. I had to take a couple of days off from work, not having any strength to get me through any school day.

I lay in bed, cry, and snuggle in Liam's arms after he gets home from his day. He's been taking some hours off from work so that he can check in on me, which makes me feel like some kind of child, but I appreciate the love.

I feel like after a week, something should've changed. I thought that my heart would hurt just a tad less, and my brain would feel a little less overwhelmed. But everything is still a fresh wound. My heart stings as if it had just been broken minutes ago, and my eyes continuously burn from all of the crying I've been doing. Harry was my world, and I blew it up.

Why did I break things off? The reasonable thing would've been explaining to Harry how I felt, instead of jumping to conclusions, and calling everything off. I'm a fuck up, and ruined the only good thing going on in my life.

I think of every good memory that Harry and I had, probably not the best thing to be doing while trying to move on, but it brings me peace. I pull the comforter from my bed closer to my face, and snuggle into the deep covers, heat filling my body entirely, now. I have an overly large jumper covering my top half, and a pair of loose joggers on my lower. This may be the third day in a row that I've worn this same exact outfit ...