The Little Mistakes (boyxboy)

Chapter 32

I nibbled on my lip while I walked down the hallway. Rikert's strong hand was holding onto mine, our fingers intertwined. He was talking to Jerrod and David about their first game of the season which was tonight. At the party last weekend I had promised that I would go. But I was kind of nervous about it. I didn't have anybody to sit with.

I sighed to myself as the guys kept chattering at my side. I followed them all the way through the school up until we reached the changing rooms.

"I'll be right in," Rikert said to his friends.

"Make it snappy, lovebirds," David said with a wink before he disappeared into the room.

Jerrod made kissing noises at us and dodged away from Rikert's swat, following David.

Rikert was chuckling when he turned to me. I smiled up at him--trying to pretend his eye wasn't still bruised up for some reason I didn't have enough courage to ask about--and quickly threw my arms around him in a hug. I breathed in deeply, finding so much comfort in his familiar scent. Rikert leaned down and rested his head on top of mine. He brought his arms up and securely wrapped me up inside them. I closed my eyes, pressing my face into his chest.

"You okay?" Rikert asked patiently, kissing the top of my head. I nodded against him. "Then what's up?"

"I hate when you leave," I mumbled sadly into his shirt.

Rikert let out a soft snort of amusement. I could picture the smirking smile on his face. "It's only a few hours. I have a game to play."

"I know," I continued to mumble. "But then I have to go home and you're going out. Without me."

"Hey," he said. He kept his voice stern and gentle somehow at the same time. "You know we can't be together every second of the day. It's alright, you'll be fine."

I knew Rikert was just pretending that it annoyed him when I got in these clingy moods. He actually loved it. He loved knowing that I would always be there like a stupid puppy waiting for him to come back to me. I knew that it was dumb of me to act like this, but I couldn't help it. Rikert was everything to me. What I felt for him was hopeless and I couldn't undo any of it.

"Okay," I grumbled.

Rikert grabbed onto my shoulders and held me at arms length away. He smiled at me but all I did was frown. I was feeling really depressed today. I barely made it through all of my classes. All I wanted was to have Rikert hug me and never let go. I could feel the urge to cry for the thirtieth time today creeping up and I tried to ignore it.

"I'll make it up to you later, I promise."

I eyed him carefully. "How?"

"Whatever you want," he said.

I swear I could feel my eyes sparkle. "Really?"

Rikert smirked and chuckled as he watched me. "I just said that, didn't I?"

"You can come over sometime next week after practice," I blurted, smiling stupidly. "And we can watch a movie and hang out with my family or something. And we can have dinner and all that! I'll tell uncle Kris to get steaks since I know you love them. Please come over," I finished, nearly jumping up and down as I tugged on his sweatshirt.

"God," Rikert said fondly. "You're so fucking cute when you get excited." He lightly grabbed my wrists and pried my hands off of his shirt. "You know I'll be there. Tuesday works perfectly."

I grinned broadly and nearly threw myself at him. My arms went tightly around his neck and he grabbed me around the waist to press us together. All the while we hugged, his teammates walked by. Some gave us weird looks, but I think that was only because I was acting like a bit of a freak at the moment.

Rikert finally sighed after about three minutes and pulled me off of him. I almost didn't let go, but I knew I would eventually tick him off if I kept it up.

"I've gotta go, babe," he told me.

He leaned down and kissed me softly a couple times. When he turned to leave, I grabbed at his wrist with a last minute decision on my part. Rikert looked at me expectantly, waiting for me to say something.

"Who am I going to sit with?" I asked, voice low.

Rikert shrugged slightly. "I'm sure you'll find someone. If not, just sit by yourself. But I really have to go get changed. Love you."

Rikert pulled his hand from mine and walked away as I stared at his back dejectedly. My face was free of all happiness as I turned around to find my way outside. Although, I didn't get far as I rounded a corner and immediately found myself on the ground, flat on my back.

"Holy shit, I'm sorry. I seriously didn't see you!"

I felt like I had stars in my eyes from the shock and the fall and I looked up in a haze. My eyes widened at the same time my cheeks flushed, and the pathetic attempt at an apology was at the tip of my tongue. But then I was abruptly cut off when the boy I had collided with smiled a smirk and spoke once again.

"Oh, Caise," Jaxon said easily. "We have got to stop meeting this way."

Jaxon shot his hand out to reach for one of my own, but I flinched horribly at the sudden movement. I swear I had never responded that badly to a fast move before and, in my currently dampened mood, I wanted to scream at myself.

"Sorry," I said, hastily grabbing his hand to assist him in pulling me to my feet.

Jaxon laughed lightly and I forced a smile. "You don't have to freak every time we run into each other, dude. I'm not gonna hurt you, that's just ridiculous."

I chuckled self consciously because I knew the idea wasn't ridiculous. I was hurt, and so this had become my natural reaction. But I had to try and control it better around people. I looked like an idiot.

"Right, sorry," I said, keeping that smile in place. "I just get caught off-guard. Won't happen again, I promise."

Jaxon crinkled his brows for a second. "It's totally fine, man. You don't have to promise anything. Shit happens; whatever. Don't stress so much, alright?"

Jaxon slapped me on the shoulder and maneuvered around me. I nodded, not trusting words to come out of my mouth without making me look worse.

"Catch ya later! Enjoy the game!"

I stared at him in confusion as he walked away. The way he talked and the way he acted threw me for a loop. It was like he really didn't have a care in the world for consequences. I knew damn well enough that I needed to behave or else I would be punished. Wrongdoings were not without repercussions. That's how it was supposed to be, right?

I shook my head desperately as I walked away. I needed to get some air because I was starting to feel claustrophobic or something.

If someone did something bad, they were supposed to be admonished for it, I told myself as I headed towards the soccer field. That's what I had learned. I thought that was how it was supposed to be. But maybe--maybe that wasn't right. What if I was wrong?