Abused//L.H. COMPLETE

ch 32

"of course." she says "your mom wants to meet you she talks about you and how she misses you." she says. "or atleast that what my mom told me."

"oh." my mood swings from sad to more happy that I've found her. My tears haven't stopped but they have definitely slowed down. "I can't believe you guys know her." I would have killed to know sooner. I missed out on telling my mom about boys and periods and other girl stuff, I had to learn it all on my own, I had to learn to cry it out to Meghan or myself and not a mom who had been there before.

"Yeah." She says.

"When can I meet her?" I ask needing a soon time.

"um." she says. "let me text my mom and have her talk to yours." I ponder about what my mom could be like about who she is about who she's become. How did she not come searching for me? Maybe that's why she stayed close?

"okay." I say "um I need to go to my room to let this all process and um think." I say getting up and walking out. I open the door and step inside, Meghan and the boys are on the couch.

"Are you okay?" Meghan asks the boys look at me in concern.

"Yeah." I nod and smile the fake at smile. They all believe it even though Meghan saw me crying minutes earlier. whatever. I walk to my room and cry as soon as my close my door. I lock the door and jump on my bed, my face hitting a pillow. My face hurts but I don't care, my heart hurts worse. I cry hard but quiet, I don't know how I manage to do it but I cry without anyone noticing for a good 5 minutes. I start to question everything, life, my mom, if my friends care, my "da----. A knock on the door interrupts my thoughts.

"Mandy?" It's Meghan. I was a little surprised she didn't notice my smile was fake. I would've thought we weren't bestfriends if she hadn't seen right through my so called "smile."

"yeah?" I ask.

"I know your not okay, let me in." She says in a sympathetic voice. I don't say a word, I just get up and unlock and open the door and start bawling into her arms and hugging her. Maybe I cry or panic too much but I don't give a fuck THIS JS MY MOM IM CRYINGG ABOUT. "Mandy it's okay." she starts crying along with me, it's a crying fest.

"my mom she-she didn't even C-come looking for me." I say about to cry harder and tell her how sad I am and why I'm sad. "does she even care, did she even care when she left me with him." I ask. My life wouldn't be so different if my mom had just taken me with her. "SHE PROBABLY NEVER EVEN LOVED ME." I sob loudly probably causing a scene in front of our guests.

"Mandy don't say that." Meghan coos. Luke starts this way and comes to take me from Meghan.

"Baby come here." He says making my heart flutter but also making the tears come faster. Luke motions to Meghan that he has it under control and she leaves the room and closes the door. Luke sits me on my bed and joins in. He puts me in his lap and hugs me tight. We don't talk we just hug. I don't want to say anything and I don't need to, He doesn't either just being in his arms is enough.

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Actually almost cried writing this.
okay I'm tired
baiiiiii
-Rana Del Ray <3