Loneliness H.S

Chapter Twenty Six

The water is pouring down my body, warming every part of it, and relaxing every muscle. I have never really liked taking showers in the morning, but after last night I feel like I need one.

Last night was special. There isn't any other word than special that can describe that night. I was so scared, but at the same time so relaxed, knowing I could full heartedly trust him. There was no need for him to reassure me with words, because his actions told every word he held back. That there was no need to be nervous at all, and for the first time I felt love, I feel loved.

Even now I can still feel his touch and kisses linger on my skin, making shivers run down my spine. That is the only thing I don't want the shower to wash away.

What made me nervous however is the fact that he was nowhere to be seen when I woke up. It made thought appear in my head like: Did he regret the whole thing? was I not good enough? I still feel nervous, but I know he is most likely out meeting Niall and Athalia.

I look over at my necklace laying on the counter. I can barely see it trough the damp shower door, only being able to see the outline, and the red color lighting up. Yes, red. This morning when I woke up it had turned re. I took it of before going into the shower, not wanting to ruin it. I have never taking it of before unless I was taking a shower, but it has been staring to feel like to much responsibility lately making it heavy around my neck, but I don't know why. I know Harry likes it because his eyes always finds a way back to it somehow every time we are together.

I should talk to him. If I go now I will probably meet him halfway on his way back to the house.

I turn of the shower, and my body immediately turns cold by the lack of heating water. I open the door and my attention quickly darts to the now blue necklace.

-

I am about halfway to where I usually meet Athalia and Niall, but stop as soon as I see Harry step out from behind a tree clearly on his way back. His hands are in his front pockets, and his posture is slack, looking stressed. His gaze is attached to the ground indicating that something is clearly going on in his mind, especially seeing as he hasn't even noticed my presence even with his heightened senses.

I clear my throat catching his attention immediately as his whole body comes to a stop. His gaze still stays glued to the ground, and doesn't look up to see who it is, probably already knowing it's me.

I step closer to him, now only standing centimeters apart. He doesn't move a muscle almost as if he is frozen still, making me extremely nervous. I lift my hand to rest it on his shoulder trying to get some kind of reaction out of him, and I do. As soon as my hand comes in contact with the fabric on his shoulder he flinches away, almost like my touch hurts him, but I know it doesn't.

"Harry, are you okay?" I almost whisper afraid that I will make him flinch away from me again in any way.

He laughs one time before asking "Why do you care so much?" He is clearly annoyed and that is clear both in his voice and facial expression.

"What do you mean?" I laugh nervously not knowing what else to do. All I can come up with that this might be about is that he is still mad about what happened with Zayn, but something tells me that it is something entirely different, and that scares me.

"Look, it's starting to make me tired, and annoyed that you're always trying to help me and care for me." He doesn't look at me as he pushes past me and continue to walk back, but I don't let him as I grab his arm making him turn around to look at me again.

"What are you talking about?" Now feeling as confused as ever not knowing what he is going on about. Why say this now?

"Okay, listen" He takes a hold of both my hands bringing them up between us, and for the first time he really looks at me. "You gotta stop caring about me so much, and trying to help me, because you only do that because you think that if you do I will feel the same towards you. Try to help you, care for you, even love you, but I won't." His voice is strict, and much darker then usual. He is talking to me like I am some child that has done something wrong, but I'm not, and I haven't. My mind is blank, and I only manage to look at him with wide eyes. Not wanting to believe what he is saying, not really understanding it, not after last night. "I never have, and never will care." He says letting go of my hands.