Behind My Blue Eyes

Chapter 15

Chapter 15

I was let out of the hospital the next day. Tess drove me home while Aiden went over finishing touches on Kat's funeral that was tomorrow.
"How do you feel?" She asked. She wasn't smiling, but she wasn't frowning either.
"I'm okay. It hurts really bad and I can't really use it, but I'm okay."
"I never asked you how you were throughout the years and I'm sorry for that. I had so many of my own problems that I overlooked how I treated everyone in the house. I was such a bitch. I treated you like you weren't worthy to be my sister and you are more than worthy. I'm so sorry." "It's okay." I gave her a small smile, "Did you talk to dad yesterday?"
"Yeah, that was sure a bombshell, and I wish I could say that I'm surprised, but they had this huge fight after one of my dance recitals and then it was as if it never happened after she got diagnosed, but something was off. I always tried to save my relationship with Brandon in hopes that he would change, and I think that is why Mom held onto Dad so long. But now she's gone and Dad broke up with his girlfriend so he could be with us. I can't help but forgive him. My whole high school career revolved around me trying to make Mom and Dad proud and I took some things too far such as not eating. I just always wanted to be perfect to balance out the fucked up family we had or have. And knowing that Dad has a regret makes the pressure to be perfect lessen. I already got into Yale, and now I get to find my own perfect. I just wished I had a date for prom."
"You got a week, Tess."
"I know. Maybe someone will pop up."

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When we got home, Kylie, Garrett and Ty were waiting for me. I knew that I would have to face Garrett sometime. Later, preferably. Yet, Ky, Ty, and Tess suddenly disappeared leaving Garrett with me.
"Hey." He started.
"Hey," I responded.
"Are you okay?" He looked at me and searched for something.
"Yeah, just peachy." I looked at my feet; I couldn't look into his eyes.
"Are you sure?" His hand tilted my chin to look at him and I lost it.

Tears that threatened to roll out of my eyes did. I was lost and scared and just so tired of my misfortune. I hated that I liked Garrett. I hated that my Mom died. I hated that my Dad cheated on her. I hated that he continued the affair. I hated how he kept it from us. I hated how Stella hated me. I hated that she won. I hated that I always lost something. I hated that Garrett made me feel this hate by just making eye contact. Is it possible to love someone at 14 years old?

"Jennie, you can talk to me." I didn't speak, I just hugged him and the contact my arm made with him set it on fire from the pain and just made me cry harder.

I hated that I felt so much pain.

"My dad had an affair and he found out about Kylie and Aiden and Tessa and he's trying to come back, but I just can't forgive him and I don't want to go back to school and face Stella or even talk to you right now because you make me feel things that I can't explain and I just. I've liked you for so long and-" I quickly stopped talking.

I didn't mean to spit out my huge crush on him. He didn't let go of me, but he didn't say anything either and I took that as a sign to run. I wiggled out of his arms and ran up to my room as a wet sniffling mess and it was another day I cried myself to sleep.