Cheater!Levi X Reader Oneshots

Beach-Asshole

"Mhm, how about you continue on your walk, through the sand, with a bleeding nose?"

"That's what you get when you stick your nose everywhere!" I continued, making this a one-sided conversation as my tall buddy held onto his nose, it bleeding for already, what, an hour now? Most likely.

"Keep quiet, will you?"

"Nah, you deserve it, gramps."

"You're older than me, though, (Your name)."

"Yeah sure, but I don't look it, do I now?"

Mike side-glanced at me for a second then sighed heavily, turning his head as we held onto our slippers. It was summer, boiling hot, and I felt like I was being roasted. Like an egg. That you eat for breakfast, you know? Unfortunately though, I was forced to make the trip to California because apparently, my, well, let's say left hand man was busily recruiting rookies for our estate, and I was forced to come along. I could've very well fired his ass though! But he's my best friend too, which sometimes sucks all the asses on earth. But you didn't hear that from me, yeah?

Back to the to-die-for-scenery on the beach in the ever-so-known California.

"So, where's this guy? You know, the one we're supposed to meet 'n' all that jazz?"

"Somewhere around here?"

"Can we just ditch the guy and go home?"

"No." Mike took a wiff of the air around us, and, in a split second, I saw a head full of black hair heading straight for me. I side-stepped, like any average person and let Mike have a bro-hug with him, because from the looks of it, the guy that was about to barge into me, was, well, a guy. What else?

"All right all right, get off, no more making-out infront of me, asses," I muttered boredly under my breath, and pulled up the stranger first, then Mike, who, might I add, tried not to put all his weight on me, but then again that was in vain. Damn guy was huge!

"There you go." I huffed out.

"You should watch where you're going, lady."

"Wow, you called me a 'lady'? Awfully nice of you, considering the fact that you look like everyone's a pest to you and nothing more than scum." I started out sassily. I patted my own back internally, I could be a sassy asshole, hooray and one point for (Your name)!

--

Five Years Later

I pranced around awkwardly, yet cheerfully and might I add, majestically. I was done eating breakfast, washing the dishes, cleaning the kitchen, and god-knows-what-else.

However, I still looked pretty horrible.

Horrible to French-peoples' standards, at least. Not that I cared much, but ever since me and  this black-haired-guy (who I later learned to be called Levi Ackerman (or Ravioli man) became a 'thing', I was stuck in France.

Beautiful, right?

Not exactly for me, it sucked butt.

Brushing a stray strand out of my face, I looked around. I'm supposed to go to work soon. Ugh. I don't really like the office all that much. I'd honestly prefer being a darn maid over all that, but, what can I say? It's not like it's up to me anymore...mostly because they pay us pretty well, so, no comment there.

Lately though, there's been something that's been worrying me, nothing about health, or work-wise. I'd have talked to someone else apart from myself (in the middle of the night while staring at a ceiling, and did I mention, out-loud? Yeah, Levi's not at home till like, late in the morning...), except I don't have any family. Apart from my sick aunt, which I really wouldn't like to worry big-time. Get me? I hope so.