the only exception, a maya hart story

s e v e n t e e n

Hours afterward (somewhere around 2 AM), Zay, Farkle, and I sat around the dining table, laughing at the slightest things and enjoying one another's company.

I sat there in my flannel pajama pants and sweatshirt, Farkle perched himself atop the granite kitchen counter wearing baggy black sweatpants and a Twenty One Pilots shirt plus a maroon beanie atop his head, and Zay was attired in a pair of Levi Jeans and a black drawstring hoodie. The all around color was very gloomy, but the conversation itself was incredibly joyful.

Eventually, we arrived at the topic we'd been dreading to discuss, but necessary to address. The happenings of tonight. Zay was the one who finally gathered the courage to say something about it.

"So.. Maya.. I know Farkle knows all of this already, but about Lucas tonight.." he began with a pained expression.

"What happened?" I asked, exasperated as I covered my face in an attempt to make everything go away.

It didn't work.

"Before we tell you anything, I just wanna say I'm sorry.. I know I should've been looking out for him to make sure this didn't happen, and-" Farkle began, his eyes at his feet.

"Stop it. You know this isn't your fault. He shouldn't need someone to tell him that getting past out drunk underage isn't right. This isn't your fault at all, this is Lucas's," I stated, with a veneer of calm masking my voice.

"But Maya, I promised you-" Farkle complained, with clear worry in his eyes.

"NO!" I yelled out, startling both Zay and Farkle.

"Maya.." Zay began. "Are you okay?"

I stared at the two of them for the longest time. My pain was killing me from the inside out.. The fact that I loved a boy who didn't love me back and couldn't control himself if I wasn't there was slowly twisting the knife in my heart.

"I can't do it anymore.. Acting like I'm not dying inside.." I finally broke through the silence.

Both of the boys looked upon me with fretting eyes, wishing for my sadness to vanish.

"He doesn't love me. Don't deny it. I'm just another girl that he can throw away after making out with her once. We haven't even spoken, and he seems so distant from me. I.. I.." I finished, unsure of how to pacify Zay and Farkle with their denial of Lucas's lack of love for me.

A single tear washed down my face as I reflected on everything of the past two weeks. God, I hate Lucas so much.

"Maya, I-" Zay began, before I cut him off.

"I'm.. I'm gonna head up to bed," I spoke quietly, but firmly as I slid my way out of the chair.

I could feel both Zay's and Farkle's eyes tracing me as I slinked up the staircase, but I didn't care. I was too angry and frustrated to care how they thought I should feel about this. My frustration pulsed through my head as I took each step moving forward. As my feet hit the soft rug, my anger seemed to dissipate through the soft carpet.

Running my hand along the wall, I traced the doorframe of Lucas's room. Unable to resist, I cracked the door open the slightest bit and peeked in to see him asleep.

With his head resting there with his messy hair, closed eyes, and soft breathing, he almost looked innocent. However, I knew better. I left almost as soon as I had come.

As I rested my head on my pillow after returning to my own room, I could feel restlessness surfacing and bubbling up above all else. The need to do something was overwhelming, and my fingers twitched, aching to be in motion.