White Lies and Music Notes

Chapter Twenty-one

'... And the tears come streaming down your face,

When you loose something you can't replace.

When you love someone, but it goes to waste,

Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home.

And ignite your bones.

And I will try to fix you...'

A tear fell silently from my cheek. I had my eyes closed, realising what the lyrics of this song actually meant.

After singing Mr Campbell's version of 'Fix you' by Coldplay for over two weeks, I knew the words off-by heart, but only now did I understand and feel the full impact of the song. I had let my voice ring out without emotion for the past seven music lessons - but now I let the words seep with more feeling than I had ever sung before.

The background music came to an end and I looked up through my eyelashes. What I saw was absolutely terrifying.

Twenty plus music students were sitting there, mouths hanging wide open, staring at me, wonder in their eyes. I looked at Roxanne, about to ask her what was going on when I saw that she - of all people - had the most shocked expression.

The room was silent as I looked at Mr Campbell, who quickly looked away. What was going on?

"Right, um, this time, can everybody please join in. Not just Leah." He shot me a smile as realisation hit me.

Everyone had stopped singing.

Apart from me.

Everyone had heard me sing.

I turned red and I could feel the heat radiating off of my skin. I was sitting at the front and so I focused my gaze on the whiteboard in front of me, trying to ignore the stares from behind. I was so embarrassed. Never, ever had anyone - and I mean ANYBODY - heard me sing before, and I was so humiliated. I had been told as a kid that I was a terrible singer, when I wanted singing lessons and I highly doubted that had changed. The next time we had to sing the song, I just sat there, keeping my mouth stubbornly closed. I was not going through that again.

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"Truth or dare, Leah?" Melanie asked. In an attempt to get me and Matt together again, Melanie and Taylor 'spontaneously' asked Matt and some of his friends to come and play 'truth or dare' with us. I don't know why I agreed, probably to get back at Ashley, or something. I don't really know, but something was urging me in. Something was telling me to do it. So here I was, playing truth or dare.

"Truth." I said, confidently. I have always preferred truth to dare, because I would prefer to tell someone about myself, than to run up to some random guy and ask for his number. So far the truth questions had been bearable, I would live.

"Tell me about your family in England." One of Matt's friends said. I looked at Matt. I had lied to him on put date. He thought my dad was a business man. If I told them all now, that he was a teacher, Matt would know I was lying, and the others would think I was lower than them. They all had families that lived in huge mansions, with fifty cars and a swimming pool. If they knew the only money my family earned came from my dad being a teacher... I don't know what.

"My dad runs a business," I lied smoothly, "He used to do...um, tombstones." I tried remembering what I told Matt. "Currently he does CCTV cameras, but he is moving onto...sports equipment." So far so good, let me just hope nothing more would come up.

"What about you're mum?" Melanie asked.

"She doesn't need to work." Technically not a lie at all.