Love and the Sea and Everything in Between

chapter thirty

I can't breathe.

My chest tightens and my breaths come in short, violent heaves.

No.

My eyes are peeled wide, staring down at the small white and pink contraption between my fingers. My lips fall open and my vision burns as everything around me starts to spin, like I'm caught up in the eye of a hurricane.

Positive.

As the pregnancy test clatters to the tile floor, my body just shuts down right there and I lean against the stall wall and start to sob, silently, my eyes clamped shut.

My mind starts racing through every possible scenario, option, and outcome.

Do I tell Adam?

How can I have a baby? I'm too young – I'm just a college student, still a kid in my own right. I don't even know the first thing about raising a kid.

How will I even tell Adam? We haven't even talked in weeks. I can't just force this on him after blowing him off.

I brought this on myself, I realize. Because of my fear, I pushed Adam away. I hate myself for being so weak, for letting this happen.

God, what do I do?

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