learn. // shawnmendes

two.

"how are you?" he asked.

"im...fine, i started, slowly, "which is better than bad, i guess. but not that much better."

"but better, nevertheless." he responded.

"yeah." i breathed out.

an awkward silence followed after that, that i knew i wasn't going to break.

"im sorry. i know i said it already, that last day we saw each other, but i really am, so im going to say it again. i didn't know you were going to be here, jack didn't tell me, which was probably for the best. because, i know neither of us would have showed if he had. i think about you a lot, sometimes i think that i might of ruined your life, or something, then i remember that you're stronger than that, stronger than letting someone like me ruin your life. anyway, the more i thought about it, i realized that if i was you, i'd hate me. lying and hurting you, it was wrong. doing it in a way that was public, that my fans could see, was worse. and i'm really sorry leena. i really want you to know that. you can punch me in the face if you want, you have that right." he finished, looking out of breath, but a little less tense and more relieved.

i looked at him for a second, before lifting my hand and watching it connect with his cheek. he winced as i slapped him.

"you didn't ruin my life, but that sure felt good," i started, talking about the slap, "you didn't ruin it, just made it a little difficult for awhile. all of my friends asked about it, and not to forget my mom did, too. and it was not fun explaining that to her. when school started again, people would come up to me in the halls and ask if i was "that girl." it sucked for awhile, but they got over it. but, everyday i can still go on twitter and look at my mentions, to see someone saying it was my fault. and it wasn't, i know that. i was stupid and naive about the whole situation, but i wasn't at fault. i wish they knew that. it was wrong of you, to do all those things and i think about it a lot, too. i don't know what it's like to live like you though, to have people running my life and to have people seeing everything i do. so, maybe i would have done the same thing, if i was you...i don't know. so, i don't blame you, did for a little while...but now i dont. if that helps you any." i replied, feeling so much better after letting all of that out, about being able to tell him all those things after all this time.

"it helps me, a lot. leena, it wasn't fake, not all of it. when we had fun and when we enjoyed each other's company, that was real. i liked having you around, you're a really great person." he looked up at me, and i gave him a small smile. "i want that back. to right my wrongs." he finished.

"i don't blame you, but i don't want to be your friend, at least not yet. i don't want to hurt you and see you suffer, anymore. but im definitely not ready to be your friend, maybe with time; probably a lot of it, but with time, maybe." i replied, trying as best i could to stay calm and not burst into tears.

"so, you don't want to punch me in the face. but, you also don't want to be my friend. so, we'll call it progress?" he asked, smiling.

"progress." i replied, smiling softly at him.

***
oooohh they talked!! I hope yall liked that, it cleared the air and got rid of all the hard feelings so we can make way for their bright future...or not so bright future? I don't know, we'll see ;-) anyway I hope y'all liked it, as always, love you to the moon and back
-jas <3