yᴏᴜ'ʀᴇ ᴍy ʜᴏᴍᴇ

Chapter 39

Slash's POV

Dear Saul,

I'm sorry I left.

I know that you're probably asking yourself why I left and what did you do for me to leave so suddenly.

I'm going to answer you those two questions. You did nothing wrong. The reason is me. I failed you, I made a mistake, a big big mistake. And I couldn't be with you and ignore the big mistake I made. It would be wrong. I wouldn't be able to sleep at night knowing that I did such thing to you and you were there, by my side, thinking that I'm the perfect girlfriend, which I'm not.

I made the biggest mistake I could ever make. It's against all of my morals, values and everything I believe in. Although it was super unconscious, I did it, it's all my fault and nothing can be done to change that.

In this letter, I won't tell you what I did. I'm not ready yet.

I'm not breaking up with you. I just need some time and space to think about my actions, and when I'm ready, I'll tell you the reason you'll break up with me.

Yes, you're the one who's going to end this relationship because I am the one who doesn't deserve you, I'm the one who made the mistake.

I love you. I always will. You're my home, Saul, and without you, I would be lost.

Thanks for everything you did for me.

I love you

Shenna

I read, and read and read the letter all over again and again and again. My hands are shaking as they hold the paper with Sheena's handwriting.

I can't believe it. No, this is just a dream.

No.

She didn't left.

This is just a fucking nightmare, and, once I wake up, she will be by my side. Right?

I can't handle the tears anymore.

She's gone.

No, she's not.

I dump the papper on the pocket of my jeans, run to the closet and open her drawers, which are empty. All empty. Not a single shirt or bra were forgotten.
I go to the bathroom to check if her girly needs are gone too, and also to have a hint, and I find the bathroom in a total mess. Pills are everywhere, everything we had in the bathroom is on the floor and her things are gone too. My wooden box is also on the floor, full open. She knows, she knows I do it. She knows.

My courage jumps off of my body and I see it running away. This day was suppose to be the best day of my life and it's becoming the worst day of my life.

Without thinking, I prepare the syringe, tie a belt around my arm and plunge the needle into my vein.

That feeling of the adrenaline running through my body doesn't change my frustration. I'm still sad, mad, angry at myself.

Putting the syringe and everything back on the box, I get up from my spot on the floor.

I scream at the top of my lungs and hit with my head against the bathroom wall multiple times.

Wake up.

Wake up.

Just fucking wake up, Slash.

I need to get the hell outta here. I can't be here.

I run off the room, run through the stairs, almost falling on the floor, and I find Izzy walking through the hallway.

"Hey man, what's up?" He says. I grab his arm and guide him outside. "Slash, what's wrong?" I don't answer his question, I just throw my car keys agaisnt his chest.

"Drive." That's all I say. We get in the car and he starts the ignition.
"Are you gonna tell me what's wrong?" He asks, worried, as he drives us out of the neighbourhood.

"It's Sheena, she left." I can't speak much than some words. I'm not in the mood to talk at all. I want to get this out of my chest, I need to, but my mood to talk isn't helping me very much.

"What do you mean she left?" He asks, confused. He's not the only one who's confused. I'm confused as well. I dont get it, why? I just need a reason.

"I don't know, man." My voice cracks and I feel tears on my eyes. "She just left me a letter saying that she was leaving, but never referred the reason for doing it." I take the letter out of my pocket. "See?" I ask, shaking the paper.

Izzy pulls over and stops the car. He takes the letter from my hand and stares at it, scanning the words. "She needs some time Slash, you have to give it to her. You know that a lot has been happening to Sheena these last few weeks. She just needs time to figure some things out..."

"What do you mean? What do you know that I don't?!"

"I know the same as you Slash, she doesn't open herself very much, and you know that. You also know that it doesn't help when people close themselves in a shell. It's too much stuff happening in her life. She's on rehab, which if she wanted, nobody knew about it, she had a fight with her best friend, probably more things had happened that I don't know about. And yesterday she had her first gig. She needs her space." Izzy's words start making sense in my head. He is right, but Sheena is a fragile girl, it's too many things to handle all alone by herself.

I don't know the whole story, and, reserved like she is, there are so many things inside her that she doesn't tell anyone.

This time I won't be able to be there, by her side, to help her.
My biggest fear is that she falls again into addiction and starts doing coke again. And I don't want that for her.

"You're right, Izzy. But I'm afraid. I can't lose here." Hold back the tears Slash, hold back the tears.

"I know how much you love her... And how much she loves you..." He sighs, giving me back the letter.

"I love her with all my heart, Izzy. Today I was going to propose her. After 3 weeks looking for the guts to do it, I was gonna do it. And now, she's gone. She left in the day I was going to propose her. I want to marry her and now she's gone." I can't hold it anymore and I crack in tears.

All I want is her by my side. All I want is everything I can't have.

A/N: Hello buddies

I'm sad
This is sad
Poor Slashy, he was going to purpose her :'((((

And now it's all gone...

I want Sleena back...

BUT

I WANT TO SAY THANKS FOR THE 2K READ AS THE 100+ VOTES, THIS IS INSANE.

I still remember when I reached 50 reads or so

Thank you very much

Love you all

And that's all for today pals. Love you guys.

And by the way

Would you guys mind to check out the story of my new pal slashaxlrosegnr? It would mean a lot. The story it's really great and you guys should read it.

Comment, vote and and believe in Sleena, it will come back, you just have to believe ^-^