Changing Harry Styles

6. Him

The world hated me I swear. This was all so stupid, this whole fucking education thing, I was a member of one of the world's biggest boybands! Why did it matter that I was smart? Oh right, because fucking management wants us to be perfect.

They had already destroyed my life so far, me and Lou had a harmless "bromance", as the fans called it, he was my other half. But management had ripped us apart, even arranging this fake relationship with Eleanor to prevent rumors. But then Louis and her actually fell in love in the process, and spent more time with her and less with me.

That wasn't even the half of it, the whole thing was fucked up.

I stormed out of Rambler's household, the blood boiling in my veins. I was done. So utterly done with this, I wanted out.

I got home, not that it took very long and got the keys to my Range Rover. One thing that always calmed me down was a nice drive around town. I got in and started up the large beast, and began pulling out of the driveway. Niall, Zayn, and Liam all came running out of the house, flapping their arms over their heads trying to get me to stop. I stopped for one fatal second, to meet Liam's eyes. They were sad, and he mouthed silently "please stop."

I almost did, I should've.

But instead I shook y head slowly, a tear dripping down my face. I continued backing up, until I pulled out of the cul-de-sac.

I turned on the radio, the silence to unbearable.

Love of mine

Someday you will die

But I'll be close behind

I'll follow you into the dark

I changed the station as fast as I turned it on, the song was just too painful.

"GOD DAMMIT!" I shouted, stopping in the middle of the road. I let my head drop to the steering wheel and gave out a frustrated groan. I didn't cry anymore, crying was useless. Wasn't like it was actually going to change anything.

I drove down Sunset Blvd., stopping at some tattoo parlour that looked open. I walked in, and small bells chimed.

"Hello, I'm Kal and welcome to Fronteir Ink, anything I can do for you?" He didn't recognize me, and as much as that stung for once I didn't care. I didn't even have to think about what I was doing, I never did with my tattoos anyways. I just picked small, meaningful things that I knew mattered. I dind't care what anyone else thought, it was my body anyways.

"Yeah, I was wondering if I could get a tattoo? Like right now?" Kal chuckled and walked over to me, patting my shoulder.

"Sure thing kiddo. Tell me, what's your name?"

"Ha-Harry, Harry Styles."  said out of force of habit. I always gave my full name to people who didn't recognize me, just to give them one last chance to realize my identity.

"Oh I know you! One Direction right? Your friend Louis was in here not that long ago, got a large deer on his bicep."

"Oh yeah, that sure sounds like something he would do." I laughed nervously, it was way too forced. Louis had refused to explain the meaning of the giant deer, but none of us ever really discussed the meaning sof our tattoos anyways, at least not all of them.

"So whatcha want Harry?" I took some time, pondering my most fond memories. Then it came to me, the accident, the ambulance, everything.

"This may sound absolutely stupid, but could you do a feather in a jar of ink? right here?" I point to my side, my left side right next to my heart, so I would always keep her close. (A/N: I know he doesn't have that tattoo, part of the story) Kal shrugs.

"Alright. I'll go draw something up, can you wait ten minutes?" I nod my head way to eagerly. Kal gets up and walks away. I am left sitting there by myself, which isn't very promising. I re-live that horrific night. It was all my fault too...

"Hey Harry? We're ready for you." Kal patted my shoulder. I shook my head and went ot the back room, following Kal close in tow. I sat down in the leater chair, and Kal put the drawing underneath my left arm.

"Okay, so I'm not going to give you they run down of getting a tattoo, but judging by your body you already know it. just a heads up this one might hurt a lot, and it'll take awhile. You sure about this? Last chance."

"No. Go ahead." He starts up the machine and begins his work.

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 When I return to the house, that burning vibe in my heart has long gone, I don't feel self-centred anymore, just sad. I pause right in front of the front door, ready to face hell. My side has a small burning sensation to it, but I don't mind. It's almost as if she's back, and I missed her to the end of the world and back.

But in the front living room, there seemed to be som sort of intervention waiting for me. Niall, Louis, Liam, and Zayn were sitting around, and a large banner that read INTERVENTION in large red letters hung on the wall. Louis had gotten the idea when one of our american buddies had gotten him hooked on How I Met Your Mother, and he worshiped Barney Stinson deeply. The sight made me smirk, we almost never had interventions unless something was seriously wrong. Then I remembered my little tantrum.

"You better wipe that smirk off your face right now. I leave you alone for ten minutes..." Louis starts, his voice already off to a ferocious start.

"Louis, please?" Liam looked at him with a pleading look. Damn, they were mad.

"Harry what's wrong? This isn't the Harry we all know and love." Their gazes were hard and judgemental, and I began feeling very insecure, but I didn't dare speak.

"Harry seriously what's up? Every since Sad-" That sadness in my stomach quickly evolved into anger, and I didn't dare let Zayn finish.

"Don't you dare bring her into this! It was my fault!" I shouted at him. I didn't want to see their faces. They didn't know, they didn't know anything. I ran up the stairs into my bedroom slamming the door and stripping off all my clothes. I laid there in my pink boxers with the words Property of Sadie Talisman embroidered in thick black thread. I don't know how long I laid there, but every last tear I had ever stored in the past year just came out, and they wouldn't stop. But then there was a knock at my door.

"Harry? Can I come in?" Niall.

"Yeah, whatever." I didn't even look when my irish friend walked in. I felt the edge of the bed dip as he sat down.

"SO what happened back there?" He asked, and for once I didn't have a snarky answer that made me sound like a jerk.

"I just miss her Niall. I miss her so much." I say quietly.

"Well I can see you wasted no time getting another tattoo. Lemme guess, the feather has something to do with Sadie?" That last word triggers more tears. Niall just sighs and pats my knee awkwardly. He was never one to comfort people, he just cheered them up.

"So what did you mean when you said it was your fault? You couldn't have prevented that car crash Harry, you weren't even there." He asks. I sit up, now would be a good time to tell the truth.

"Niall, that's not what happened, actually there's something I should tell you." I say sheepishly. He raises an eyebrow, but I give him no time to finish. I let the story unfold, the true story about what happened to my beloved ex girlfriend. Throughout the story I watch Nialls eyes grow in fear, and once I finish he doesn nothing, just stare at me like I am a hopeless human being with no excuse to live. He would now hate me, and he had every right to.

God I hate the truth.

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Yeah yeah I know he doesn't have that tattoo but I don't really care. It goes with this story.

Don't Let Me Go>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

*Doncheshire*