18. Him

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As soon as I walked out the door, I stopped.

What was wrong with me? WHat could have possibly compelled me to kiss Meredith?

I still hated her.

Or did I?

Let's face it, you couldn't hate her if you tried. She didn't have a bad bone in her body. She was nice, beyond nice, and she genuinely cared about everyone, well I don't know how much she cared about me, but she cared for everyone else. She was stunning in a not os stereotypical way, more of a natural beauty. Her smile was the most brilliant thing I had ever seen. She was one of the best people this world had seen.

She made Sadie look like a complete ass.

 She was no Sadie, that's for sure. She would never be Sadie because no one could be Sadie.

But no one could be Meredith either.

It hit me so fast, I almost fell over. Meredith. She was so perfect, she was the complete package every guy wanted to settle down with. I suddenly got visions of the two of us going for hikes, with her telling me about the different kinds of plants. The two of us sitting on my porch swing, me holding her toned body in my arms while I sing her to sleep. I wanted to be with her, I fancied Meredith.

But not in a sexual way, in a legit, romantic, way. Much unlike when I first met Sadie, I wanted to drag her to bed and not let her leave for three days straight, then after time feelings grew for her. With Meredith, they all came so fast it was unnatural, unhealthy most probably. I wasn't even sure what was happening to my head and my heart, but I knew one thing for sure.

I had to tell her.

Without a second, much deserved, thought, I turned right around and walked right back into Meredith's house. She was sitting on the couch, drinking her hot chocolate, watching something on DIscovery Planet. When she saw me, she looked mad, really mad.

"Harry what the hell! I told you to leave god dammit!" she yelled. I was supposed to say something, but you see, I acted before I had made the decision that I wanted to say something in the first place.

"Um.. uh..." I mumbled.

Tell her! My subconcious told me. Tell her about your feelings towards her, tell her that you fancy her.

But I don't! I silently replied. I didn't, did I?

Of course you do you bloke! Tell her, or you may never get the chance.

"Uh Harry? If you don't have anything to tell me, could you please leave me alone? Thank you." Meredith's voice pulled me away from my internal conversation.

"I really want to be friends." I blurt out. If my subconcious had been a real, breathing person, I swear to god it would be facepalming right now.

"Pardon me?" Meredith asks in shock.

"I want to be friends, like you and Niall. PLease, I could really use someone right now, and the boys aren't always my first choice." She sighed, and stood up.

"OKay fine, but no more green freak or derogatory comments about me okay? Friends don't do that." I sighed.

"Yeah okay, promise." She held out her arms.

"Uh Meredith, what are you doing?" I asked her. She rolled her eyes and laughed.

"I' offering a truce hug. Handshakes just don't seem to do the job for me, so I do hugs." Her smile warmed my heart, and I hugged her. She smelt like sandlewood and lemongrass. Two smells I was confident of because Sadie had worked at Bath and Bodyworks for awhile, and those were her two go to gifts for people for christmas.

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