Phanfiction - Wonderboy

Part 22 - Final chapter

Dan’s POV

I shut my eyes open when I felt someone driving their hand through my hair. I didn’t want to ruin the moment. His fingers drove slowly through my hair, and all the way down touching my skull. I held my breath. Then I finally turned around and faced Phil.

“I do care, Dan. How can you think I don’t?” he said.

He was just about to go again, so I grabbed him.

“Don’t leave me. I don’t want to be alone.” I said.

“All right, I’ll stay.” he said.

I slowly pulled him towards me. He lay down next to me on the sofa and I shared my duvet with him. Phil avoided my eyes.

“Dan, I’m.. I’m so sorry about everything..” he said.

I hushed him.

“Stop thinking.” I said.

I stroked his ruined arm. There were so many cuts, and they were so deep. It made me want to cry, knowing Phil felt he had to hurt himself physically to feel something. I wanted to protect him from stuff like that. I drove my hand up under his shirt and felt his bare skin, which I had longed for, for so long. I could clearly feel he had lost weight. I got tears in my eyes. It was my fault. I was slowly destroying. It was almost like he could read my thoughts.

“Don’t blame yourself, Dan.” he said and lifted my head so he could see my eyes.

He wiped away a tear. Then he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me closer. I intertwined our legs. God, how I’d missed falling into place with Phil. I inhaled his scent, and kissed his neck.

“By the way, they know. The class, they know.” Phil said.

“I know.” I answered.

I knew we still had a million things to talk through. And I knew we had to face the whole class again on Monday. And my parents. But I didn’t know if coming clean in front of everyone would make things easier or more difficult. And I didn’t know if I could get Phil to stop cutting.

But all that insecurity didn’t matter right now. All that mattered was that in that very moment I was kissing Phil again.

Explosions in my head and firework in my stomach. And it felt like my heart had woken up again from a long coma. Lips, tongue, teeth, spit. Magic that was unexplainable. I had hit rock bottom and got lifted up again by Phil. He always knew if something was wrong, he was always there when I needed him the most. He was perfect in every possible way, and I was endlessly happy that we found each other again. Our lips split and we just stared at each other.

“I love you.” Phil said.

I smiled at him. “I know,” I said and kissed his forehead.

“I love you too.”

________________

The end...