one direction preferences / imagines

he wants you back

Harry - He wasn't supposed to know this address. He wasn't ever supposed to be there. These two things Harry Styles knew to be fact. He had wrestled with whether or not to show up and, every time he considered it, he remembered that this wasn't his business and it was a really terrible idea. However, it seemed as soon as Eleanor mentioned you moved back to England, he couldn't stop thinking about going over to your building. It had been quite some time since you had spoken to one another and even longer since you saw each other, but Harry still actively let you enter his daydreams from time to time. He wasn't obsessed, far from it, but he honored the time you two had and wouldn't ever deny it. His closest friends always referred to you as 'the one that got away' and, if Harry was being honest with himself, he would agree. Eleanor pointed out that you were really the one he let go of, but that only frustrated Harry to think about. Cloaked in darkness, he sat in the small lobby of your building for fifteen minutes, playing with his fingers between his knees and the ceramic poodle on a table top before shutting off in his internal dialogue and working up the courage to go up to your floor. He took the elevator; there was less thinking time in there than if he had taken the few flights of stairs up to your door. It crossed his mind that you might not even be home, but where would you possibly be at eleven pm on a Tuesday night? After all, you had only just moved back to England a few weeks ago according to Louis's girlfriend. As soon as he was standing in front of your apartment door, he forced his knuckles on it rapidly and then stuffed both his hands into the pocket of his black pants. Harry thought about fleeing the hallway immediately, but he heard the shuffle of feet on the other side and anxiously waited for the door to open. In the ten seconds it took for the door to open Harry's mind contemplated everything from if a man opened the door to if you would look in the peephole and then deny him access, but it opened up and Harry's mouth just hung open. He didn't think it was even possible, but somehow you were even more attractive to him now - not to mention he was just simply unsure of what to say. "Hi Harry." Tilting your head lazily to the side, you smiled at him cordially and held your pelvis with one hand. England was huge and Harry was busy, there was a part of you that thought you would never really run into him, but you two did have mutual friends and they all seemed to think Harry deserved a second shot. "Hi." Bashfully, he looked up from his hands in his pockets to your face. He was like a small child, meeting his parent's friends for the first time, swallowing secrets and words he wasn't supposed to say behind tightly shut lips. "I don't really know what I'm doing here." He admitted, sliding one hand from the depths of his pockets to hold the other close to his side. He wanted to reach out and hug you, but wasn't sure if he was allowed to. "I'm assuming you came to see me." Plainly, you stated. "Yeah." He couldn't deny it. "You look great, [Y/N]. Really. I'm not just saying that because it's polite." Harry always did like you in blue, but he never knew why. It just flattered you somehow. He remembered the last time he saw you, you standing with your back to a bonsai tree at a friend's wedding, explaining quietly but clearly why you two couldn't see one another anymore, a silk dark blue dress floating around your silhouette. He couldn't even realize how deep his sadness was running at the time with you looking like royalty. Of course, you would be wearing something soft and blue now. It was just his luck. "May I come in?" Harry swallowed before asking, he really hoped he wasn't pushing his luck but he just wanted to have you in his life again. He thought it would be nice considering there was a time where you two got on well and regarded one another as a friend. With your teeth together, you spread out your lips and looked over your shoulder. Your uncertainty was vibrantly apparent. "My place is still in chaos. Boxes come every day, so it's sort of a mess right now..." It wasn't even a lie. "You can say no, [Y/N]. I'm an adult now." He always assumed his age had been an issue for you, back when you were a couple. "You don't have to dance around it kindly." "Hey, Harry, you've obviously had time to prepare yourself for this. You just showed up at my door. Pardon me for wanting a minute." It was funny how easily you two slipped into your former roles. He had always been eager and excited to be with you while you had been the voice of reason in the relationship, the teacher and confidant to his student and explorer. "How did you get my address? Was it Eleanor?" If she wasn't such a good friend, you would have been furious. You weren't actively avoiding your ex, you just didn't see reason to bring up these emotions and be put in a situation just like the one Harry currently had you in. "Why didn't you tell me you moved back?" He didn't want to sound hurt, it was supposed to be a private emotion, but you would have spotted it in his violent blue eyes had you not detected it in his voice. "I just...I just didn't." You shrugged simply. "It's been so long, Harry. So much has happened since you and I were together. It just didn't occur to me. We've both moved on." "Yeah, but..." Harry knew what you said was fair. Time had passed, he had had two serious relationships since being with you and he had heard through friends that you had lived in Greece, Amsterdam, and Montreal since then, but it still upset Harry to not be included in your life. Thinking about it now, he wished he could have heard about your travels and work experiences from you and he wished you had been his friend still when he was engrossed in those past relationships. "I still love you." He had moved on, you had moved on, but he was still hopelessly in love with you.