Playboy Mouth (Queen Bee/RaStro)

Back For Good

CHAPTER FORTY-NINE

I c e

Today is my wedding day. A bride should be happy right now but I'm not. If someone is going to ask me about Kai's whereabouts, I cannot tell that person the answer, because once again, she bailed out on me. She left. The morning she found out about Shintaro, she suddenly disappeared. She only left me with a note that says:

I love you. I'm sorry.

You see, I knew it would happen. I was scared but prepared at the same time. I know she can never accept the fact that I've been unfair to her. I know it is hard for her to take in the truth that I am no longer hers, and Shintaro's existence will remind her of the pain that she's given me.

This time, I understand why she left. I will never question her again for leaving. It is my fault. I am taking all the blame. I just hope that she won't despise me because all I wanted was to stay in her life, but then things got out of my control. I let this happen. Again, it is my fault. She is not the one to blame.

As for my baby, I don't know why, but I see Kai in him. They have the same eye color. I know it will be difficult growing up without a real father, but I will give my son all the love that he deserves. I will never let him feel that he's unplanned. In fact, he is my miracle. He had given me hope.

I faced the mirror, staring back at myself. Happy memories with Kai come back. A warm tear rolled down from my eye. After this day, I will try to eliminate them one by one. I am finally letting her go. I don't know how long it will take me to get over her, but I will put in all my best efforts to forget. We had so many chances, and yet it always ends up like this. I guess this is destiny's way of saying that we are not meant to be together. Our love story is screwed.

As I get older, my perspective about love has changed, especially when I gave birth to a beautiful human being. I see no one with me in the future but my son. My upcoming marriage was only an agreement. It is never a love marriage. He's just going to save me from shame. Victoria Valmont and Crimson Marasigan told me that it is not necessary for me to do this. Yeah, I know, but I wanted to. I feel like... I needed to. My son needs a father. I will sacrifice my own happiness for my kid.

Tori and Red, gosh, even tita Reese, stepped inside my room. Valmont whispered something to Marasigan. Crimson just laughed. De Leon, on the other hand, lectured me about the Family Code. Wala naman daw siyang napag-aralang requirement ang magpakasal kahit na hindi mahal makapag-save face lang. She emphasized on being a single mom is considered normal nowadays. Tita Reese says it's tough but it's worth it.

"What the fuck, adults? Playing games on me again?" This time, Red is the one who whispered to Tori. This woman is very kind, intelligent, and beautiful. Erin is lucky. "Yes, yes, I know you understand me. You didn't agree to this and-" Tori, then whispered to Red. "Ano ba?"

"Come here."

"I don't want a hug from you guys." Still, nagpayakap pa rin ako. I have three mothers - the doctor, the mafia goddess, and the consigliere. These three have "The Godfather" vibe and it's awesome. I couldn't ask for more.

"Sshhh," They all spoke in unison.

"Masisira ang make-up ko. I don't want to cry. I wanna get married now, so we can get this over with." I look over to my wedding gown with a sad face. I caressed the fabric slowly, wondering what would Kai look like at our wedding. Too bad, it isn't going to happen. "It's getting late. We should get this thing going. I wanna get out of this dress." My story is far too different from Victoria and Crimson. I can say na the closest one tita Reese. I wonder how tita Ken-Ken is doing.