Sorry, I Love You!

36. Love Hurts

Song of the chapter// You're missing by Jason Walker

Eugene Hansen's POV......

It had been two weeks since I told Abigail everything and since I had last seen her. She had been avoiding me not that I didn't expect it but it still hurt. I wanted to know how she was doing, I craved to hear her voice and I yearned to see her face even if it's just a single glance for a second.

Abigail filed a case against my father and we were informed about it just last night. To say my father was ashamed would be the understatement. After he found out, he locked himself in his room and hadn't come out since last night. I went to talk to him number of times but he wouldn't let me enter. I was beyond frustrated and pissed.

He was pushing me away as well just like Abigail. I didn't blame her for pushing me away but why was my own father pushing me away.....again.

"You can't lock yourself inside your room for the rest of your life. You have to talk to me, dad. Let me in. I am your son." I yelled banging on his door for the fifth time since last ten minutes. From the amount of times and force I had been using, my knuckles had turned red and I was sure I would have a bruise later. Screw that. Who cared about a bloody bruise when your life was at stake?

With that, I started to pound louder on the door. "Open the damn door, dad. Talk to me. Don't push me away again dad." I yelled but the last part came out softer than I had expected and I noticed how much I still cared about my father even after I convinced myself for four years that I hated him.

I pressed my forehead against the door, my breathing coming out in pants because for the first time in my life I was afraid of getting lonely. After a few minutes of silence, I heard a click sound followed by the opening of the door.

"Dad." My chest tightened once I took in his appearance. His hair was disheveled, his eyes were bloodshot and had bags under his eyes, and he was in the same cloth from last night. He stepped aside to let me in and I didn't waste a second to enter before he changed his mind.

"Are you okay?" I questioned, looking at him concerned. He gave a weak nod as he sat down in his bed and patted the spot next to him. I did as he wished and sat next to him. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"Isn't that the reason you were trying to break my door in the first place?" he humored despite the crack in his voice.

I looked at him sheepishly. "Well, yea."

He sighed, sucking in a breath of air, a thick tension filling the room. "I regret it, Gene." He said after a period of deafening silence. I looked at him as he elaborated. "It was the day of your mother's first death anniversary. I was feeling guilty, I still am but that day I let myself get carried away. I drank a lot to get rid of the guilt and then I just started driving."

"Anna tried to stop me but I wasn't in my right mind. I wish I had listened to her. If I had, nothing would have happened. They would be alive. I wasn't looking straight as my mind was stuck somewhere else that I didn't see the car coming toward me. When I noticed, it was too late. I turned the wheel to right without looking at anything and crashed onto the first car that was in front."

"Later when I opened my eyes, I was in the hospital. Anna told me about what happened. I can't explain you how I felt at that moment. Because of me, a child lost her parents. A child became an orphan because of my one weak moment. I wanted to admit my action and confess but then I thought about you. You were still recovering from your mother's death and I knew you would be devastated if you knew your father had become a murderer and killed a family in his recklessness."