Useless and Unwanted ..

part 9

oh my god! I recognized the face. I can't believe it! my own father. The man that made me. The man that raised me. Raping me, taking advantage of me and taking my one precious , pure gift away. Tears rolling down my face "daddy why? why are you doing this?" He laughed, "shut up you little cunt" and he smacked me across the face. thrusting himself in and out of me forcefully causing me to scream of pain. "thank you slut! I'll be back for more later" he said. I watched him get up and turn his head to wink at me. I could hear his chuckle as he made his way out the door. tears streaming down my face I rush to put some clothes on. Feeling disgusting and violated I wrap myself in to my covers and cry into my pillow..

I roll over in my bed and look at the clock. Its time for me to get ready for school. I get out of bed and head to my dresser to grab some clothes. shutting the dresser drawer I make my way to the bathroom. I look at myself in the mirror. disgusted at what I see. I could feel the tears swelling up in my eyes. I begin undressing slowly so I didn't stretch out my stomach causing me a lot of pain. I take one more look in the mirror analyzing my wrecked , bruised, violated body before I head to the shower. I make my way to the shower turning on the water to a hotter than normal temperature to help sooth my aching body. I climb in placing myself under the shower head releasing hot water all over my body. This felt great and helped clear my mind for a few moments. I reach down and turn off the water stepping out of the shower, grabbing my towel. I start drying off and wrapping my hair in a towel. I grabbed my clothes and put them on while placing my hair in a loose bun. looking in the mirror at my bruised face I grab some face makeup to cover up the purple bruises. once I had fully covered up my bruises I hung my towel up taking one final look in the mirror, placing a fake smile on my face as I head out the bathroom door. I make my way down stairs with my book bag around my shoulders. I head out the front door without even saying a word to my father and step mother. I begin walking to school running through my head everything that has happened to me since my mom died. why must this happen to me?