Nobody Has To Know

Chapter Fifteen

*KaShawn POV*

Ever since the day at Chay shop I been drinking non-stop. It seem like I was drinking all the pain away and I would drink until I forget what happen that day but I just couldn’t. I haven’t been home because it seems like all her stuff is there. She didn’t say we were broken up but I mean I can read between the lines and you know after what happen at the shop there is no more Chay and I. The thing is I let my jealously get the best of me. I should have just been concern on how to make Chay happy and all I wanted to do now was go to her house and cuddle up with her. Without Chay I have nothing, I lost all my friends, my family don’t give a fuck about me, and now I lost the only person who cared about me.

“Sir we are closing the bar” said the bartender as I took other sip of Ace Of Spades. I shook my head got up from my seat laid a $100 bill on the bar and walked out. I got in my car and just sat there thinking about how I had Chay pinned up to the wall. That wasn’t even me, it seem like another person took over and I couldn’t control it. I started driving and my Pandora kept playing Drake sad ass, that just made me feel even worse. I stopped at a place and looked up and notice I was at Chay house. Maybe thinking about her so hard made me drive here, I don’t know. I just sat in the car wondering if I should just drive off and leave Chay alone or go in the house to explain myself. I sighed and looked at my clothes from three days ago, then got out my car. I looked around and her car was up front meaning she was here. When I finally got in front of her door my hands were shaking and my head was thumping even harder. I knocked lightly on the door and my palms started sweating and I felt like I was going to throw up three nights worth of liquor. She opened the door and she had her hair up in a sloppy bun revealing the marks I left on her neck. She looked like she been crying for days and haven’t had no sleep. I just wanted to take her in my arms and comfort her so she wouldn’t look so hard and depressed.

“What are you doing here?” she said closing the door up some more but I pushed open and came inside. “Did I say you could come in?”

“Kachay I just came to talk” I said turning to face her. She just stared at me at first then she scoffed and closed the door. She went to sit on the couch and I followed right behind her and sat across from her. “First off I wanna say that you made me so mad that I had to put my hands on you to shut you up and get you to listen to me”

“Look I thought you was coming in here to say sorry but since your not, I need you to get the fuck out my house. I ain’t got time for the bullshit bro” she said adjusting her shorts.

“I wasn’t trying to hurt you” I said putting my head in between my hands.

“Well Shawn, too late for that” she said standing up.

“Don’t you understand that I love you Chay and I just messed up this one time. I didn’t mean to sleep with her-”

“You slept with her?” she said cutting me off and looked me straight in my eyes. Lord I done fucked up now. I just shook my head and sighed “So that’s why you recommended her. So I would look stupid and supply your sideline bitch. You got life fuckin fucked up Shawn!”

“Look Chay it only happen a couple of times-” and then wham. She slapped me in the face and I looked at her she had tears running down her face “Chay please don’t cry. It just happened, I mean if you were there instead being with Chris none of this would have happen”

“What else am I suppose to do? You just made me look like a dumb fuck, falling for you and shit. Plus me spending time with someone caused you cheat. Oh Wow! And to think that I was actually gonna say I love-”

“You love me?” I said completing her sentence. “Do you love me?”

“It doesn’t even matter now, I just want you to get out my apartment.” she said wiping her face and started walking toward the door. I grabbed her arm and pulled her back to me “Nigga I’m not your toy, you can’t be pulling on me and shit”

“Answer my question” looking at her with pleading eyes “I will leave as soon as you answer my question.”

“Do I love you? No. Was I falling in love with you? Yes. And I was a big ass dummy to even do that” she said grabbing her arm. I didn’t even try to grab her arm back, then all of sudden my phone rang. I looked at Chay then at the door and I looked back at my phone, I answered it.

“Hello” I said

“Hey KaShawn I just want you to know that your suppose to be girl has been fucking Chris. Yes your friend and I thought you should know your fucking with a ho!” then click the girl hung up. I looked at Chay and I felt all the rage build up, just like it did at the shop. Like another person was taking over me. I ran to where Chay was and slammed the door shut. I got hold of Chay and started choking her, I didn’t even care if I was hurting her, all I was thinking about was how all this time she been making me feel bad, when she was doing the same thing. To think I trusted Chay and Chris together and this whole time they been fucking.

“Shawn let go of me” said Chay trying to get me to loosen up my grip, I just gripped even harder.

“YOU FUCKING CHRIS? HUH?” I yelled at her and she looked surprised and that just made me grip even harder. “ANSWER MY QUESTION CHAY”

“Yes” she tried to get out and when I heard that I slammed her to the ground. I looked at the door and saw that it was unlocked, I walked over to it and locked it. I turn back around just in time to see Chay reach for her purse. I ran to where she was and snatched the purse and looked through it. “What you was going to do? Call that bitch ass nigga Chris to come save you” I said smiling down at her purse till I spotted her gun. I looked up at her , she looked so scared and she rubbing her neck. “You was going to shoot my ass!” I said enraged. She didn’t say anything but she got up and tried to run to the door. I caught her and she started screaming and pounding on walls as I took her upstairs to her room. She think she was going to get away with this shit, she got another thing coming. I slammed her down on her bed. Chay didn’t waste no time with trying to get up but I slapped her in the face. She yelled out in pain and I was just getting more and more furious, so I slapped harder and harder repeatedly.

“Shawn please stop... Stop, stop, PLEASE” she would cry as I slapped her harder and harder.

“You wanna give that nigga whats mine, so now I’m going to have to show you that this pussy is mine and never do that shit again” I said, I started ripping off her clothes. Chay just kept crying and crying, it was pissing me off. I put my hands around her neck makin her look straight in my eyes “Shut the fuck up!” she just shook her head and cried even harder. I pinned her arms up so she couldn’t move them and she had her legs pried together so I wouldn’t get in. I removed my hands from her arms and started punching her thighs, she finally just pried them open. I unbuckled my pants and slid them down, then jammed in her hard as I could. I was going to beat the shit out her pussy. I looked up at her she was trying to tell me to stop but her voice was gone so half of her words weren’t coming out. I just covered her mouth with my hand and kept going. Going harder and harder not caring if I was hurting her or not just thinking about how she fucked everything up. I looked down at her face and it showed tears falling down her face and fear in her eyes. I mean if she just had listen to me we wouldn’t be going through this shit and the more I thought about it the more I wanted to hurt her. I was cumming when I heard footsteps and I guess Chay heard them too because she bite my hand. “Shit!” I yelled and lifted my hand off her mouth. With her scratching voice she yelled out “SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME!” and I tried to put my hand back on her mouth but she was fighting even more now. All of sudden I heard a shrink from behind me. I looked back and saw Kizzy, with her hand over her mouth.

“YOU NASTY ASS BITCH ASS MOTHERFUCKER!” she said as she pulled her gun. When I saw that I jumped off Chay. She started shooting I tried my best to dodge them but the room was dark I couldn’t see shit. When I thought I was okay, I felt a sharp pain in my left shoulder. That didn’t stop her from shooting at me, I finally escaped from Chay room and ran down the stairs. When I got out the house I never looked back til I knew I was outside. When the cool air hit my face it was like the old Shawn came back. I thought of what I just did and that wasn’t like me at all. I started to feel nauseous about what I just did the next thing you knew I was running to the bushes throwing my guts up. After that I just stared up in Chay’s apartment, I slowly walked to my car. When I got in I didn’t waste no time to drive off at full speed, and I picked up my phone. When I was punching the dashboard hoping that someone would pick up the phone, finally at the last ring they did.

“I need your help.”