Second Chance

Chapter 20

I shut the door to my room and walk over to my bed. I go to climb under the covers, but I stop. Someone is in my bed. Instead of freaking out, I calmly walk around and go to the other side of the bed. I lift the covers to find Loki peacefully sleeping. What is he doing here? I pull the covers back up to him and I walk over to the balcony. I step outside and let the cool night breeze gently caress my face. I lean my hands on the railing, and take my time looking at everything. The tall buildings, the details of them all, and the fact that I just might be the only one awake right now.
"No, I am as well." Loki says wrapping his arms around my waist.
"How did you hear my thoughts? I wasn't saying them out loud again, was I?"
"No, it is just one of the many things my magic allows me to do, my love."
"Well, isn't that romantic. Don't you think it might be easier to just ask me what I'm thinking?"
"Actually, no. You do not necessarily enjoy sharing your feelings." And he's right. He has poured his heart out to me and I can't even look at him without getting a headache due to my emotions going crazy.
"I'm sorry." I whisper, not really knowing what to say.
"You do not need to apologize, my love. I know how hard all of this can be..." He sighs. I turn around and look up at him, putting my hands on his waist.
"So, are you gonna tell me why you were asleep in my bed?"
"Well, if I may, I found it hard not to see you sleeping near me. I have been in the same room with you for quite some time now, and when I went to sleep in my room it did not feel right."
"Well, is that sentiment I hear?"
"You would be right, my love." He practically purrs. He gently kisses my nose.
"Why are you so sweet to me?" I ask him softly.
"Sarah, you are the reason I am who I am right now. If it was not for you, believing in me, you know exactly who I would be. Do not take my kindness as merely being sweet to you. I am completely and hopelessly infatuated with everything about you, my love. I would be the luckiest of all the God's if I were graced with having you by my side for all of eternity." A tear rolls down my face and I step out of his embrace, walking to the other side of the balcony.
"What are you saying Loki?"
"I am trying to express my feelings for you, Sarah. It is just hard for me to do so."
"Why though? Why me? I'm just a girl who has a temper almost as bad as Bruce, who has daddy issues and can't keep her emotions on the subject in line, and cares too much. You could have anyone you want? You already have a wife, don't you? Why haven't you tried to see her yet? I'm sure she misses you..." I didn't realize I was semi yelling at this point.
"Is that why you are upset, over Sigyn? Sarah, we have not been husband and wife in centeries. She and I did love each other, but we were not right for each other either. I was self destructive, and she was a fragile woman who's only goal in life was to be a mother-"
"It's not just about her, its about all of this! You can't be with me, you know that right? I'm not immoral like you are, and this place isn't what I call home. Earth, that's my home. I'm an actress, and I love being able to play different parts. I'm an author, and I love writing through the eyes of different characters. And I'm an Avenger, and I love my new found family. And then here you are, standing there looking at me like you could never be with anyone else. This is your home. And I want you to stay here and be happy. I want you to find your true happiness all on your own. You don't need me to hold your hand anymore.. I was merely the one who brought you back from a dark place, but I'm not the one they say is giving you back your heart... I'm just bringing you home.." I can feel the tears stinging my eyes, sliding down my cheeks.
"Sarah, do you really think I would not be with you just because you are mortal? My Lady, you are hiding so much behind those eyes. Please tell me what is heavy on your heart.. Tell me what you want, please!" He begs me. He stands a few steps away, looking at me with those beautiful green eyes.
"You know what I want? I want you to pick me up, hold me close, and tell me all of your secrets. I want you to show me what love feels like, because I don't have a goddamn clue. I want to kiss you, pull you close to me and tell you everything is going to be alright. I want to tell you how I feel but I'm not even sure how I feel right now. I don't know what love really is Loki. But right now, I know that I have never cared for someone as much as I care for you. And I don't have the slightest damn reason for it. All I know is that I want you!" I scream, and the tears only get worse. He closes the space between us and pulls me to his chest. He holds me so close, that it almost feels like some pieces of my black heart are actually coming back together. He pulls back and looks down at me, wiping a tear from my cheek.
"I love you, Sarah Jones." He whispers. I look up at him and I can't stop the smile that crosses my face. He loves me.. I put my hand through his hair, pull him down and kiss him. His fingers are in my hair, pulling my face as close to his as possible. Our lips dance together, and I can feel the heat rising inside of me. I need more of him. I want him. He picks me up and looks down at me, smiling.
"You know, we have to be somewhere in the morning."
"Yeah, you're right. I should probably go to bed." I giggle. He sets me down on the bed and I crawl under the covers. He starts to walk away. "Hey, where are you going?"
"To my room."
"I don't think so." I say as I pat the spot next to me. He smiles and comes to join me in bed. I sit up on my elbow so that I'm looking down at him. I trace my name on his chest with one of my fingers as I just look at him.
"What are you thinking, my love?"
"I'm thinking about how I became so lucky. To have someone like you love me so much."
"It is I who is the lucky one. To even be in your presence is a true blessing."
"I love you, Loki Laufeyson." I whisper in his ear. He smiles widely and tackles me with a devoring kiss. It feels like the kiss has lasted a life time and when he pulls away we are both gasping for air. "We better get some sleep." I smile. I roll him over, put my head on his chest, and snuggle into his side. I can feel his heartbeat, and I slowly but surely fall asleep to its musical rhythm.