Second Chance

Chapter 32

A week has come and gone. My heart ache not going away. Thor has tried to get me out and about, but all I want is to stay in my room. In the bed we once shared. In the world we once frolicked in. I stand on the balcony, trying to keep myself together. I rest my hands on my stomach, and realize that has become a natural posture for me. I go to my closet and pack all of my things into my suit case. I can't stay here. I have to get out. This place will only consume me with sorrow. I pull down a dress or two, and put them in the suit case as well. Knowing I might never wear them, but I want to have them anyway. I head to Lokis room. I take one of his shirts, a couple of books, and a note pad that was sitting on a table. It has his writing on it. I know I can't bare to read it now, but eventually I will. I go back to my room and pack it all away. I head to the throne room, knowing what I'm about to do. I step inside and Odin has just taken his seat on the throne. I keep my hands at my side, resisting to touch my stomach, for I don't want him to know about the child. Or he will not let me leave. I get to the bottom of the stairs and bow.
"Lady Sarah, what brings you here today?" He asks, seeming genuinely concerned.
"I have come to tell you that I am going back to Midgard."
"Is there a reason you do not wish to stay here?"
"Please don't take any of this the wrong way. I love it here. I have never been in a more lovely place. But at the same time, I need to get away for a while. Like when I came here the first time, I was getting away from earth. Now, I just need some time to cope. And see all of my family on earth." I say as a tear rolls down my cheek.
"I am surprised you have come to tell me this. Why did you not just leave?"
"I have a request to make. The only reason, I have not completely broken down and lost all of my sanity these last couple of weeks has been for that fact that the Lady Kari has been so helpful toward me. She is a new found friend that I don't think I can part with."
"What are you asking, Lady Sarah?"
"I'm asking if it would be OK if the Lady Kari comes with me. I'm afraid that if I don't have her around, I might just lose myself.."
"Does the Lady Kari wish to go with you?"
"I haven't asked her yet. I wanted your approval first."
"I am glad that you asked. I would normally not let this happen, but seeing as you have no bad intentions, and I trust you will return eventually, I will allow this. Only if the Lady Kari wishes to go."
"Thank you, Odin. I can't thank you enough for all that you've done for me." I smile through the tears and bow. I begin to leave but I feel a hand on my shoulder. I turn around and Odin pulls me in for a hug. I'm very shocked by this, but I hold onto him, and start to really cry. He pulls away and wipes a tear from my cheek.
"It will be alright Lady Sarah. I have felt this feeling before. When my son was gone the first time. And when you brought him back to us, I was so relieved. It may not seem so, but I care deeply for my son. I love both of them dearly, and I hope for mine and your sake, that all of this works out. I know you truly love him." He says as you can see a tear trying to break through his one eye.
"I know. Please don't let Thor get hurt trying to find him. I'm barely holding together with him gone, I don't think I could bare not having them both." I smile.
"I shall try, Lady Sarah, but you know Thor." He smiles back. And it's a whole smile. Like he truly means it. I lean up and kiss his cheek, and leave the room. I go to find Kari in the kitchen.
"Lady Sarah, you have come out of the room. I was just about to bring you something to eat." She smiles warmly.
"I came to talk with you. I'm leaving, for midgard."
"Sarah, you cannot leave. I will miss you." She sighs.
"And I want you to come with me."
"What? The All-father will-"
"He already said you can come with me if you want to. Please say you will. I need you Kari, more than you realize. I have a house big enough for you, me and the child and even a whole other family. I will buy you new clothes, and you will stay with me, and help me raise this like bundle of joy." I smile. She looks around for a moment and looks back at me with a smile.
"Well I must pack my things then." "That's the spirit. Meet me in my room when you're done." I smile. I head back to my room and sit on the bed. I'm gonna kind of miss it here. I grab the notepad out of my suitcase and a pen. I flip to an empty page, trying not to read what Loki has written and begin to write a note to Thor.
My dearest Thor,
Thank you for everything you have done for me and for your brother. I hope you find him, but please try to be careful. I am going back to midgard with the Lady Kari, and when you read this please come see me. I have something I wish to tell you, it is very important. Be safe, brother.
Love,
Sarah Laufeyson
I rush to Thor's room, open the door and set the note on his bed. When I get back to my room Kari is waiting on me. I stick the notepad back into my suit case and grab her hand.
"Hold onto your stuff, this is going to feel strange." I smile. She grabs her bag as do I and I teleport us to my house. My actually house. Not the shield helicarrier, not the one in Costa Rica, my house. It's a Victorian style house, three stories, with a pool in the back yard. I go to the door and unlock it with my keys. Glad I remembered to take these with me. We go inside and I show Kari up the stairs. The third floor is where my room is along with two other spare rooms. I open a door to one and let her have a look. She smiles and says its lovely. Though my rooms aren't as big as the ones we have on Asgard, they are fairly spacious. The room she has is a light shade of brown with matching curtains and bedding. I go to my room and put my stuff down as well. I call and order Chinese take out, and wait for them to get here. I hear a knock at the door, but when I open it, it isn't the delivery guy. It's Nick. He looks at me and I collapse in his arms as I cry. He holds me up and carries me back to my living room. He sets me on one of the leather couches, and looks at me.
"Sarah, what has happened?"
"Loki and Thor went on a mission, and Loki was taken by thanos. We had to fight off an invasion and he still hasn't been found. Thor has been searching for him, but nothing has come up yet. And... I'm pregnant." I can barely get the last sentence out. Nick looks at me with a stern face.
"Listen, I know all of this is shocking. But you are the strongest person I know, and you will get through this."
"But I don't have a goddamn clue how to take care of a child. I've never been the type to think of baby names. I mean yes I've always thought about having a family of my own, but not like this... What if he never comes back?" I ask.
"He will come back. I have seen the way he looks at you Sarah. That boy would do anything for you. He will come back, you just have to give it time. Thor will find him."
"I know you're right, but I wish so badly to go find him myself. I know I can't. My heart is telling me that I need to go find him, but my body, my soul, my head, they all say to stay. Because I now have this little life inside of me, and I have to protect it at all cost. I have an appointment in a couple of weeks..."
"Sarah, you are not alone. I am going to help you with all of this, I promise. I see you brought someone with you." He says as Kari comes into the room.
"Ah yes, Uncle Nick, this is Kari. She's my best friend." I smile. "Kari, this is Nick. He's the leader of my team I told you about, and he's also the one who helped raise me."
"It is nice to finally meet you. Sarah has told me so much about you." She smiles, shaking his hand. A knock on the door is heard and this time it's actually the delivery boy. I eat my food and nick talks to me for a while. He leaves, telling me he will be back to see me soon. I think coming down here was a good choice. I really needed to see my family. I go up to my room and head to bed. I change into regular pjs and shut off the light. I pull Loki's shirt out of my suit case, put it on and curl up in bed. For some reason, instead of making me more sad, it comforts me. I wrap myself into the covers and drift off to sleep.