The 5 And Only

Chapter 14

Morgan's POV

I feel really bad for what I said. Harry cares and I know that I don't know why I would say that. Harry has been with me since the beginning of all this. I mean he doesn't know about depression, or cutting, or anxiety, or paranoia, or suicide, he doesn't even know my mom committed suicide. None of the guys know how she died. Harry was still there though, even at 3 in the morning he would skype me when I felt like shit and he'd make me feel a million times better. He would text me back even if he was in the middle of and important meeting, he would even accept my phone calls in the middle of sound check. He was there when I had no one else to go to because Brooke and Gavin just made me feel worse sometimes, and I can't really go to Mike without him asking a million questions so I just went to Harry and didn't tell him why I was sad I would just say I needed to be cheered up. Immediately he would just tell me a corny joke that would get me to actually smile and laugh. He wouldn't even ask why I needed to be cheered up. He understood me even when he had no clue what was going on. I'm so thankful for that and I shouldn't have said what I did. I plan on telling Harry about everything at some point also, I really want it to be soon but I just don't know when.

I slid into my bathroom, the mirror fog-free. My usual makeup was already layed out in easy access since I used it everyday. I called it my lazy make up because it consisted of liquid foundation, black eyeliner, and strawberry flavored chapstick. I quickly added all of that onto my face making sure the foundation blended and my eyeliner didn't look stupid. I added some chapstick then threw it onto my bed because if I use it I carry it around all day. I have no clue why it just makes me feel a lot better on lazy/sad days. Once I was done with that I took my hair out of the towel on top of my head then brushed my hair out. It was dry and began to look a little frizzy so I put it up into a high ponytail then I pinned my bangs back with neon yellow bobby pins. I walked out to my wardrobe and decided on really baggy neon yellow sweat pants that have green and white writing on them along with a tight white t-shirt and a green tank top underneath.

I had all the new clothes Perrie and El bought me, but today I just wasn't up for glamour I didn't feel to well at all. I began to get a headache and stomach ache after I ate breakfast so I don't want to be uncomfortable all day on top of the sickness. To top off my totally fashionable look (not) I put on a dog tag necklace that fell in between my breasts and i put it under my shirt where no one can see it. The dog tag had my first, middle, and last name, my date of birth, then some other random stuff about me. Then on the back it said property of Harry Styles. Harry got it for me for my 13th birthday. I laughed every time I read it. Then I remembered Liam's ring, I looked down at it then took it off revealing the words "We will last longer than infinity" followed by a heart etched into my skin. I smiled then put the ring back on. Finally I sprayed on some One Direction perfume, put on a pair of white Toms, grabbed my school stuff, then ran downstairs figuring Brooke was waiting with Gavin outside. Surly enough I was right. When I reached the bottom stair I heard a car horn beep.

I darted outside after quickly making sure I had everything. Gavin opened the door to the passenger seat then he jumped into the backseat. Brooke stopped at a nearby coffee shop like every morning. All we had to say to the brista was "The usual." and she nodded her head and began making our coffee. In the mean time Brooke ordered a cinnamon bun and Gavin bought a large chocolate chip cookie. Usually I ordered a brownie, but I had cereal plus I still don't feel good. Before I knew it we were at the doors of the torture chamber, high school...

***AT SCHOOL: LUNCH***

I was sitting with Brooke, Gavin, and a couple other friends at our lunch table trying to decide when I should tell everything to Harry and Liam. I'm not sure if I should tell them at the same time or different days or the same day just different times or if I should tell them some things one day then the rest another day? I just am clueless. I only felt worse since this morning. I think I slowly sprang a fever also. I didn't eat anything at lunch and instead of staring at my food I wobbled up walking to the trash cans trying not to puke.