I was a little shocked by what Ava asked me.
To be honest, as much as Richard has hurt me, I can't help but feel guilty taking away Ava. She is and will always be his daughter. The anger in my heart caused my daughter to be angry at her father, not that she needs to be.
I realized
I was selfish.
I didn't want to share her with her father, thinking that, Richard could easily have another child with another woman. I didn't realize that it was not just Richard I was hurting, it was Ava. She couldn't have another father, because she couldn't love another father as much as she loved hers and I forced her to leave the one she had and loved so dearly. She couldn't hate her father for hurting me because I never told her what happened, she hated her father for not coming after her.
When we just moved to Paris, I would hear her cry at night, calling her friends from home, wanting to come home.
I want to go home, but I don't know how. I don't want to leave mama, but she doesn't want to go home.. She won't even talk to me about it. Papa isn't even looking for me, he isn't even answering any of my calls. Maybe, *she sniffs* he doesn't want us anymore.
My heart bled for my daughter, but I thought I was doing what I thought was best for us. But I guess it was only what was best for me. I was nursing a heartache, my daughter was reaching out, and I wouldn't let her. I didn't even ask her if she wanted to leave.
And then there's Papa George, he was calling me everyday, apologizing for his son. Anak, umuwi na Kayo ng apo ko. Please. Miss na miss ko na Kayo. Pinagsisihan na ni Richard lahat ng ginawa niya. Please Anak.
Sorry pa, pero kailangan po muna namin lumayo. Babalik din po kami, promise Yan Pa.
Kung andito po siguro ang Mama Remi mo, di ka aalis.
I was selfish to the person who treated me as his own.
Then I told Ava,
Sige Anak, you can go see your papa.
A/n: I know I don't have that many likes yet, but thank you to those who hit that star button, it means so much. But hey, comments are welcome too, I don't bite.
To be honest, I'm in a rut, hence the short updates.
