Cause of Death {{PETERICK}}

//chapter ten//

Patrick wanted to be there whenever Pete needed him, but he couldn't be. As much as he wanted to, he couldn't let his life revolve around someone else, especially not someone else who he had only just met. It felt strange to remind himself that he had only just met Pete, but at the same time, Patrick couldn't forget it. Patrick wished he'd known Pete for longer, then maybe he wouldn't have been quite so affected by Mikey's death. Although, maybe if Patrick did know Pete, he would know Mikey as well, and both of them would have been just as affected.

It wasn't something Patrick wanted to think about that much. Instead, he chose to focus on Pete, who, despite saying he was okay, still looked upset. Patrick didn't expect him to be fine straight away, but he didn't think he would still be quite so sad-looking. He tried to ignore it, he knew Pete wouldn't want him to feel so sorry for him. Even if he was in dire need of some attention and affection, he didn't need to babied, he was a grown man. Patrick tried to think about something other than Pete, but he couldn't.

While he failed to avoid thinking about him, Patrick realised that Pete had come to him when he felt too alone to cope by himself, and he took that as much more of a compliment than it was supposed to be. Pete didn't need to be babied, but he didn't need to be put on any kind of pedestal, either. As interesting as Patrick found him, Pete Wentz was just another person. He didn't feel like he should have to remind himself of that, but, for some reason, he did. There was something about him that was just too special for Patrick to not be amazed by.

"We should do something together," Patrick said, "are you hungry? It's nearly lunchtime."
"...Like a date?" Pete asked, sounding surprised for some reason, "Do you want to get lunch with me? Like it's a date?"
Patrick nodded, "That was the plan, but it doesn't have to be like that if you don't want it to be. I don't want to make you uncomfortable--"
"No, no! I-I would like it to be like that, of course I would! I think I like you a lot, Patrick. I would love to go on a real date with you."

Patrick didn't realise that Pete shared a similar feeling about him. It was the word 'think' that stood out, though. Pete didn't like him, he just thought he did. Patrick wasn't too sure of what to make of that, but he didn't want to waste an opportunity, so he didn't mention it. He quickly convinced himself that it didn't really bother him, he just wondered what it meant. That was one of Patrick's biggest problems, he didn't tell people when he was confused by something they'd said, and ended up never knowing what anybody really meant.

Before leaving his house, Patrick smiled at Pete, another blush covering his face, and reached out to hold his hand. In Patrick's head, their date would only be totally perfect if they got to do everything that adorable couples got to do, and that included walking everywhere whilst holding hands. It wasn't always practical, but it was always cute, and Patrick loved to do cute things. He'd never had anyone to do them with before, and he didn't really want to have a relationship if it couldn't be everything he wanted, that being cute and loving.

He was rushing into it, though. Patrick wasn't in a relationship with Pete, they were just going on a date. He was glad that they had both gotten over trying to be 'just friends', but that didn't mean they were suddenly boyfriends. That wasn't how it was supposed to work in real life, maybe it worked like that in high school, but Patrick had no way of knowing. He was actually kind of glad he hadn't dated anyone in high school now, otherwise he would have been more confident, and probably wouldn't have let himself get set up on a blind date. He never wanted to go on that date, but now he was so glad that he had. Patrick didn't know what he'd be doing right now if he hadn't met Pete, but it wouldn't be anything as bad as what Pete might have been doing if he hadn't met Patrick.

Patrick still didn't want to think about that, of course, he was going on a date with Pete, not taking him to see a therapist. It was terrible, but he hadn't done it, and in this moment, it didn't matter. It would matter in the long run, but it didn't right now. Patrick was just happy that he got to go on a date with Pete now, and he was almost certain Pete was happy about it too.

Once Pete and Patrick were out of the house, they began walking, their hands tangled together and swinging gently between the two of them. It looked like the kind of relationship that teenagers would consider 'goals', and Patrick hoped that it could be one day. The two of them realised that they knew what they were doing, but not where they were going, and decided to discuss that.

"Where would you like to go?" Patrick asked, being the gentleman of the 'couple'.
"You know the cafe," Pete suggested, "the one we met in? I think we should go there."
"Sounds good, it's nice in there. I used to be one of the regulars there until I realised how much sugary shit I was buying from there."
"Sugary shit? From there? I saw you as more of a bagel kind of guy, if I'm honest. Fuck, and I thought I was the one with the sugar problem."

Patrick was glad to hear Pete laughing like that. He knew Pete was sad a lot of the time, and he hoped Pete knew he didn't have to hide that. Patrick was certain that it was genuine laughter.

"Probably now," Patrick laughed, "I haven't gone near cake for a few months. It's really helping."
"Helping with what?" Pete asked, "Don't tell me you're uncomfortable with your weight, Patrick. You look really good--"

Pete cut himself off, but that was probably for the best. He thought Patrick was one of the cutest guys he'd ever met, and he planned to tell him that eventually. Now he wasn't so sure if he should hold it back, though, if Patrick was worrying about his weight, then he needed to hear it.

Patrick smiled sadly, "I know you think I look fine, but I don't."
"You do, Patrick," Pete insisted, "your weight is up to you, for the most part anyway, but, if you ask me, it doesn't need to change at all."
"You're very sweet. I kind of get what those hipsters mean when they say 'it rains hardest on those who deserve sunshine the most' now."
"I think we both get rained on a lot more than we deserve, Patrick Stump, but I think that's going to change soon enough."