As Time Passes

Carry On

        I speed walk to my house. Disappointed in myself. Why couldn't I have come sooner? I bring back the brownies that Mrs. Williams had made for my family. my Brother eats four, mine and his. my mom eats one of hers, and saves one for later. I don't particularly like brownies, so i just get a glass of water ad then head to my room. I think about it, how am I gonna talk to her? Should i go back to her house later tonight? No. That'd seem too desperate. I can't do that. She'll find out I like her. What if i just keep it secret, and I don't even talk to her about it. That way, she doesn't find out I like her? That might be a good idea, but on the other hand, what if she like me? Huh, why can't i just forget about her? It might be a good idea, just to leve it be, just let her date "Mr. John what's his face". I mean, the jealousy will be hard to deal with, but it always is isn't it? I don't even know what I can do to ease my mind off of this situation. I mean, come on Tyler, you've got to stop obsessing over some girl you JUST MET A FEW DAYS AGO! She doesn't even like you! Give up! It's not worth it!  These exaggerated thoughts were flowing through my mind like a river. I had no chance. There's no way I'll be able to give up on her. She's to important to me. I can't. 

        I get ready to go to sleep, disappointed in myself. Why the fuck, can't I just get over her! I got to sleep disappointed that night. Chloe, why do you do this shit to me?  I think to myself, as I fall into a deep lull of sleep. I don't think of Chloe at all during the dream, because she's not in it.

        When I wake up, the first thing I think of is getting some breakfast. I don't really care about Chloe! I do not think I'm over her, I just think, that her dating John, doesn't bother me anymore. I mean who am I to say who she can date? If she likes me eventually, cool. If she dates John, or someone else, for the rest of her life, that's fine if she's happy. As long as she's happy. I think to myself. As long as she's happy, I'm happy, and as long as she's happy, I did my job. I ponder if she will ever like me, probably not. But if she does, I'll be here. I will be here for her when she falls, to pick her back up.

        I get ready. I am going to the cities with my mom, it is a trip we always take around December. We usually bring some of moms friends. It's a fun trip, but the hotel is usually shitty, and the weather is like hell froze over, and my brother is like ten hits of speed he's so annoying! It really is fun though, we get to go to a water park, get Chicago style pizza. Whe live in Greensville, IL, so we don't usually get to eat pizza like that. We get to see a concert. The only downside of the whole trip is that it is a few hour long drive. And we have to go with ANY of my moms MANY friends. I go outside, packed and ready for Chicago.

        WHATTHEFUCK!!!!!!!! It's like Chloe's family is following us! My mom just HAD to pick to bring HER FAMILY?! I swear, and I was JUST getting over the girl. Chloe looks pretty sad. I wonder why, it's probably nothing. Probably none of my concern. They put their bags into the back of our family minivan, and my family piles our stuff on top of theirs. I was getting in the back and my mom said, "oh, sorry Tyler, Mrs. Williams is sitting next to me in the front. You'll have to sit in the back, with Chloe." "Great." I say back to her, Just what I need, to sit by the girl of my dreams, for hours, and feel the dying need to talk to her, but not having the god damn balls to actually do it. To half to feel the burning jealousy in my heart. Having to deal with it. I sit next to Chloe, and the worst thing in the world happened. The worst possible thing that indicates, oh, I don't like you at all. When I sat down, Chloe scooted away from me, and looked out the window. Not even acknowledging that I was there. As if I was a monster. As if I was a creepy bastard that spied on her all the time. I couldn't describe the feeling that went down my spine when she did that. I felt like she hated my guts. It might not seem that bad for someone to scoot away from you when you sit down, but for someone that has a crush on the person that scoots away, it's torture.

     (Hey guys and gals, nothing much to say today. It's chapter, five-ish. Idk. It was really different, Tyler is very different in this chapter. He's more timid.

         If you liked this book, you might like some of my others, so check out my account, CoreyBush11! I have one other book, and I try to post as much as I can. You also might enjoy works by: @Justinnzabinski, @Enderxjustice, @yesterday90, and @Alexussangter, so go check them out too! As always, a comment is much appreciated, if you liked this chapter, leave a vote, and if you want to stay in tune, be sure to follow! Anything is very VERY much appreciated, I love to talk to you guys, and get you feed back, so feel free to leave a comment or check out my message boards, I will always reply! as always, -Bye)