Someday

Chapter 19 :O

Chapter 19

A lump formed in my throat, I tried my best to keep my composure stable but it was nearly impossible, I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do first, scream, break down, hide? I looked at my mother who had a guilty expression written all over her face. She couldn’t bear look me in the eyes, she was trying to hide away from the truth she was bound to tell me.  “My father?” the words came out deliberate but looming I was filled with rage, part of me wanted to find that man I called dad and hurt him. “Yes, Daisy but-“, “But what?! Don’t you dare defend him how could he do that to you, to us? I’ve been living with a man that could have potentially killed me! Why are we still living with him in the first place?!”  I was out of breath my heart was thrashing; I had gotten up from my bed and was now starring at my mother in bewilderment. “Daisy, the man we live with,” she stopped unsure of whether to go on, she looked at me through tear filled eyes before she continued and spoke the next words through sobs; “He’s not your father Daisy, Mathew isn’t your biological father sweetie”.  I was at a loss for words, my breathing became irregular and I felt massively dizzy, I slowly started fading away before my mother took hold of me. “I’m soo sorry Daisy, I’m truly sorry for everything, you don’t deserve this princess” she was holding me tight, holding me for her dear life as if I was going to vanish away, she cried deeply while I just sat there as her tears fell promptly onto my shoulder. “I want to hear everything, I want the complete and honest truth” I turned to face her knowing this was going to be long talk.

“ I was In a dreadful relationship when I was 25, the guy was an awful person and he didn’t love me, but I did, and that was my first mistake. I thought he would change over the course of time, maybe it was because he was being put under a lot of stress?  I’m not sure what I was thinking but a couple of months later I found myself pregnant with you, the most beautiful gift I could have received. Once he found out, he started becoming more and more aggressive, and I started fearing for your life, so I decided to leave him. I didn’t want someone so aggressive to be a part of your life, so I found a small apartment a couple towns down, and managed to work and take care of you on my own. I was fine for several months, and I was able to give birth to a healthy baby. Then, suddenly when I was working at the diner one day, I saw your father. He threatened me, saying that he was going to find a way to take you away from me. He wanted to take the most precious person away from me, and I wasn’t going to let that happen. So I instantly feared for your life, I started going on the run, moving every few weeks. 

I was scared, I was prominently scared. I became paranoid thinking he could be right behind me, I would tell you not to cry because I felt that if you did, he could hear you. He would always find a way to scare me into thinking he was everywhere. This sadly, went on for 2 years, until I finally saved enough money to move to another state, somewhere I could start off fresh with you. But, by that time you were used to not crying that you never shed a tear anymore. Every time you would get hurt or scared, you would just shut your eyes tightly. I would tell you it was okay to cry, but you wouldn’t, part of me thought you were still scared. To this day, I still think you are scared sweetie.”

“What about Jaiden and Victoria? Are they my siblings?” my voice was drone, no emotion of any sort. I was emotionally drained from everything my mom told me. I felt empty inside, with no way out.

“Yes, they are your siblings, after I moved here with you a couple of years later I met Mathew, and he showed me that he truly cared about me, but most importantly you too. Mathew had been in a previous relationship before we met and they had had a child which was Jaiden, you both were around the same age so you two got along great. Jaiden was always protective over you, like a big brother should be, and you two swore that you were related. Mathew and I soon got married, and a couple of years after, we had Victoria.”