Reserved [Book V]

Train

Areum barely slept but her eyes were wide open, afraid that if she ever closed them, she wouldn't be able to save herself. Her knuckles were white, fists shaking as her fingers wrapped around the seatbelt tight as ever. She couldn't bear to have the strap press against her chest for with nerves this bad, everything that would put pressure against her body would make her feel suffocated.

Her attention was all over the place except for – surprisingly – Zitao on the driver's seat. He had said two simple words ever since he picked her up from the apartment: Don't worry.

Ironically, the simplicity of those words doubled her scare level even when in his eyes shone genuine protectiveness, even when the short sentence was voiced out gently, his demanding tone kept elsewhere. Areum noticed it of course, for small details like that made Zitao exciting, but she was beginning to drown in her anxiety that the good sides of the boy was being thrown off like trash.

She almost broke down, watching people flood into the entrance like ants running back home. The subway was definitely not a place where claustrophobics usually hang out. It was a living nightmare.

She hadn't even paid attention enough to realize that Zitao killed the engine and gone out. He went to her side of the car and tapped a finger on the window to get her to follow. Her own were shaking, unbuckling herself and hesitantly stepping out of the vehicle.

"It's just eight stations." Zitao muttered; eyes on the busy workers rushing to catch their train. "I'll be in with you."

"Of course you are... or I'll make sure Wonshik oppa beats you up after this." Areum answered, almost in a whisper. Turns out, her confidence was starting to run away from her as well, being dragged along by her courage.

There was a small smile on Zitao's lips, but Areum was too busy looking around. "If threatening me makes it less frightening, I'll let you do it the whole time."

She shook her head. "I can do five hours in the gym today. Anything but this."

They were dummies next to the parked car. Anyone who would stop and observe would realize that the two stood out from the scene, two heavy rocks stable in their spot while the river flowed steady and strong.

"If you survive this, no one can say you didn't." Zitao stated, gazing down at Areum's pale face.

"What price do I get in the end?" She matched the stare and watched as he got fazed for a second, probably not expecting her to stare back. If circumstances were different, she would've focused on the thought right above her head. You're a lot cuter up close.

Zitao shrugged. "A new book...?"

"I've got hundreds at home." She shook her head.

"I don't know what – "

"Tell me a secret." There it was; the line that wanted to escape her mouth a hundred times, much like the amount of stories stored in her memory. "...a real one."

Zitao sighed after a minute of thinking, took her hand tightly in his, and went straight for the subway entrance in large strides.

***

She never stopped shaking and because of the continuous reaction, he couldn't find it in him to release her.

Buying tickets was a long wait and the arrival of the train was much worse. If the crowd was this thick on a Saturday, Zitao could only imagine Areum's panic on a weekday, which subconsciously, made him tighten his grip around her much smaller hand.

He almost gave up and pulled her out of there, but the train slowed by the platform and it was now or never. People were so cooped up in their own worlds whether it would be talking to a co-worker or speaking over the phone, that noise was getting louder as the train reached its stop.