SHE'S MINE → JASON MCCANN

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A/N: This is a part 2 of the first prologue. I'm just writing how she coped with Jason's absence over the months.

chapter seventy-one |
Y o u r p o v

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3 months since . . .

Everything reminds me of him. I can't escape him—I hate it. I can't eat, I can't sleep. I can't even think without breaking down. Just the thought of him is enough to trigger emotional feelings. Everyday, for the past three months, I've been putting on a brave face for everyone. I wake up & wonder if what I'm doing is right. I haven't whispered a word about him to anyone. No one knows what I've been through for eight months.

I can change history. If the FBI actually had a face to put with the acrimonious killer, Jason McCann, I could become a hero.

But I can't. After all this time, some parts of me wants to protect him. Why? I still love him. Everyday I wish that I could forget him. I wish that his face wasn't perfectly encrypted into my mind. I wish that I could just let go of him. I wish it was easy just to forget about someone you love. I wonder if he forgot about me? Of course he has, it's been months & he hasn't even called. Three months to be exact. A small part of me is hopping that he still thinks of me—us, what we had.

Everything is not the way I thought it would be. I thought that everyone would believe that I shot Jax. But weirdly enough, a man stepped forward claiming to have shot him. I was confused, I had probably thought that Jason turned himself in. Then again, I knew he hadn't. I knew him. He wouldn't have come forward to protect me.

My mother told me that a man confessed, the man also showed the cops where he buried the gun. Jason never buried the gun he used, nothing made sense. Just the way he was able to rule me dead to the cops, I believe he was able to get someone to take the fall for me—well him. He has connections like that—but the momentous question is: Who would take the fall for something they didn't do? To my discomfort Jax shared the same suspicions.

Meeting Jax after everything that has happened felt weird for me. That fact that I can look at him knowing what truly happened makes me feel sick almost.

"You look...different." He said. I felt so uncomfortable standing by him. After everything that has happened, I just feel weird looking at him. He came over because him and Ashton were going out to play fuse ball. I never thought they would ever hang out. Ash never really liked him. "Different as in good or bad?" I asked , he let out a shy laugh. It was weird how he functioned. For someone who got shot in the head, his recovery didn't make sense. It was almost impossible.

"I actually don't know." He shrugged. Ouch. I guess the nights I'd spent crying was finally taking a toll on me. Once he noticed my reaction, he started to feel bad, I'm assuming. "That's not what I mean—it's just—I don't know. It feels like I'm looking at a stranger. Isn't that weird?" He asked with a smug smile.

Because you are.

"It is." Is all I managed to say. Me & Jax were inseparable once. He was my first serious boyfriend. It was weird for me to just look at him & feel nothing. The air grew quiet as we stood there in silence. After a couple moments he decided to spark up conversation. "They found who shot me." He says. I perk up, finally watching him. "Yeah, I-I heard." I say. I felt guilty. I was standing there, pretending to not remember that night, when all it did was eat away at me. "I never told anyone this but I remember hearing you struggle. I know you said you left—but I don't remember you ever leaving. Did you get hurt?" He asked. I swallowed down hard, feeling a huge knot at the bottom of my stomach.

"You can remember that night, clearly?" I asked skeptically.

"Not really. It hurts sometimes to remember." He said. That made sense.

"What do you remember then?" I asked him. He thought for a moment. "You kissed me. Then my mind just—I don't know. I remember feeling & excruciating pain. I heard you struggle, I don't know. Were you attacked?" He asked me. While he was trying to remember he kept closing his eyes, fixating on that night. "No. I kissed you then I left. No one attacked me. If they did, I would've told the police." I lied, sounding defensive.

"I'm not saying you lied. I'm just trying understand what I do remember, okay?" He said, leaning closer towards me. I'm stepped back, feeling uncomfortable. "Did you think I shot you?" I asked him. His eyes widened from my question. "No. Y/n—I never thought that." He said deeply. "But I felt doubtful. When I was in the hospital you never visited me. That hurt." He confessed. I started to feel like shit. Protecting Jason was making me look like a inconsiderate human being.

If he got shot, why didn't I visit him?

That's a very important question that I didn't know how to answer.

Ashton stormed down the steps.

Perfect timing.

He was wearing his typical black jeans with a black ripped t-shirt. Once he noticed me & Jax were talking, he eyed us suspiciously. "What are you guys talking about?" He asked, before I could fumble on my words Jax spoke. "Nothing really." He shrugged. I thought that was weird.

I wondered if it is possible for Jax to get his full memory back? Couldn't he actually figure out that I didn't leave him, before he got shot? No matter how much Jason tried to protect me, there is still some loose ends. Getting someone to take the fall didn't solve everything.

_

5 months since . . .

I heard my cellphone ring from my night stand. I perked up, grabbing it effortlessly. I noticed that I was getting a call from an unknown number. My heart started to race,

Is it him?

A part of me was trying not to get my hopes up, while I stared at the screen. While another part of me was feeling almost euphoric.

Maybe it's him. Maybe it's not.

I pressed the answer button, hesitantly lifting my phone to my ear. I waited for a moment, I didn't hear anything. After a while, I finally decided to speak. "Justin?" I asked softly. I almost called him "Jason", I was alleviated that I caught myself. I heard slight breathing on the other line. I knew it was him, it had to be. "I know it's you. Say something?" I asked desperately.

"Come get me. I-I need you to come back for me." I practically begged. His breathing got heavier as my voice broke. I waited foolishly for him to respond.

What was the point of calling me? To play with my emotions?

"If you don't come back for me, I'm going to move on. I'm serious, all you have do is say something to me. Let me know it's you & I'll wait for you." I said. By this time a tear fell from my eye, I bit on my lip, anxiously waiting to hear his voice.

My heart shattered once the line went dead, causing me to break down completely.

A/N: Thank you for reading. Don't forget to vote if you enjoyed this chapter.