Femme Fatale

Five Years Later

Carmen sat in a rocking chair, rocking herself back and forth whilst humming a lullaby both to herself and the small child that she cradled in her lap, who was making adorable babbling noises in response to the humming. It was her child that she held. After the child eventually started to fall asleep, Carmen slowly put him in his crib and smiled down at him, admiring how adorable her son was. Shutting the light off in the room, Carmen left the room and made her way to the bedroom that her husband and her had shared. Crawling into bed, Carmen opened her nightstand and pulled out her diary, flipping through the pages to find a new blank one. Taking out her pen, she began to write.

"When I look back on what has happened the past few years, the amount that has changed absolutely astounds me. I'm not the woman I used to be. I'm stronger. I'm a fighter. Time changed me. Time changes everyone. Time heals all wounds, and mine are definitely healed. Initially when I first met Thomas, I was scared. Actually, to say I was scared was an understatement. I was terrified. When I came back from the dead, I had a terrible time trusting people. I always thought that someone had a secret agenda against me. But luckily, Thomas being the smart and patient man that he is, he helped me through those struggles and I opened up to him, something I've never been able to do for a man for decades.

After Aria committed suicide following Tate's death, I felt like I was finally free. I know that sounds like a terrible thing for me to say, but it's true. After she died, I felt like I was free to live my life however I wanted.

A month or two after I first came to England, I met Thomas, my husband. The day we met, I was at a museum. He was admiring the same painting as I was. We exchanged name and numbers, and we began dating. On our first date, we established that there was to be no secrets between us, that we would tell each other the truth about ourselves and nothing but the truth. He revealed to me that he was a vampire, but promised to me that he would never do a thing to hurt me. He had been a vampire for a century, and he had his thirst for blood very much out of control. For the first time in my life, I had come across a man who was gentleman-like and genuine. Although he was a vampire, he had never seemed more human. Even after I told him what seemed to be my entire life story, he still accepted me for who I was and there was no judgement. He believes that everybody makes mistakes. He accepted me because I am not that person anymore. I've grown. For once, I actually like the person that I am. I have a wonderful husband. I have a wonderful child with him. A few months ago, Thomas and I had adopted a child. We had wanted a child for so long, but we knew that conceiving a child was impossible since he was a vampire. When we laid eyes on Samuel, we absolutely fell in love. The day we took him home, I had never felt more content and complete in my entire life. Thomas is a very wealthy man due to the family that he comes from, and thanks to him, we have a roof over our heads and we're more than financially secure. If someone were to read this, they would think that I married Thomas for his money, which is definitely not the case. I married Thomas for who he is. I couldn't care less about how much money he has. He could be poor and I would still love him as much as I do now.

I am finally living the life that I've dreamed of living. When I was a little girl, I wanted to have a husband and a child of my own. I wanted a family that was the complete opposite of mine. My family was broken, a family that was damaged and unfixable. When I was turned into a vampire, the dream was destroyed. I knew that as long as I was a vampire, I would never able to find a husband. The guys that I liked were human, and I didn't want to give them the burden of immortality. Being immortal is not what it's cracked up to be. You may find someone you love, but if they're human, they will grow old and die of old age while you're still the same. I know that I sound like a hypocrite when I say this. I'm a human with a vampire husband. Thomas even offered to turn me back into a vampire so we could spend eternity forever, but I refused. I value my humanity. I look at things way differently than I did five years ago. What Thomas decides to do when I die is completely up to him. I would like Thomas to move on with his life after I die, to not spend his life reminiscing on what could have been had he turned me. However, he's a grown man. He can do what he wants.