pen pals // c.t.h.

small talk

**december 18**

*ainslee pov*

You know that feeling you get when you feel totally at ease when you're with somebody. Well, that's what I feel with Calum. I dont what it is about him. His fresh vanilla and cologne scent, or his warm, milky, brown eyes. Maybe it's the way he talks with his deep but soothing voice. Or maybe his warmth, that resembles a cozy fireplace keeping me warm during a cold, winter's night.

Maybe just everything about him.

We sit at a table in Starbucks, taking sips out of our coffee and enjoying each other's silence. Every once in a while I'll take a glance at him; sometimes I catch him taking a glance at me and sometimes I see him staring off into the distance. I'm just waiting for him to say something to start a conversation.

He finally looks up from his coffee and says, "Am I staying at your house or am I going to have to book a hotel? Because I kind of assumed that I was staying at yours so I did-" I put my hand over his to stop him.

"Yes, Calum. You are staying at my house."

*calum's pov*

I wait for Ainslee to say anything, just anything. I don't want to start a conversation because I don't know what she wants to talk about. Every once in a while, I will glance up at her and find her glancing at me but other times, she is staring at her coffee, stirring it, even though the creamer and coffee are completely mixed.

I decide that I will start with small talk by asking a question. "Am I staying at your house or am I going to have to book a hotel? Because I kind of assumed that I was staying at yours so I did-" She cuts me off by putting her hand over mine. My eyes lead over to our hands. My heart starts rapidly beating, my hands become clammy, and shivers run up and down my spine.

Why did that happen just now? It's just Ainslee.

"Yes, Calum. You are staying at my house." She clarifies, taking her hand off of mine.

"Are you alright?" I ask her, giving her a small smile.

"Yeah, especially today." Ainslee says, giving me a wide smile. "What about you? How are you feeling?"

"Tired." I say jokingly. But I take it back as soon as I see her face drop from a smile to a frown. "Hun, I'm just kidding. I'm extremely happy." Seeing her frown turn into a wide, bright smile makes me smile.

"Oh, I didn't tell you what happened with Mali."

"That's your sister, right?" I nod to answer her question.

"Mali texted me the other day and said that she was sorry for not talking to me as much as she should as a sister."

*ainslee's pov*

"Oh, I didn't tell you what happened with Mali", he says spontaneously.

"That's your sister, right?" He nods to answer my  question.

"Mali texted me the other day and said that she was sorry for not talking to me as much as she should as a sister-" My wide smile dropped.

I couldn't help but envy Calum. Mali apologized to him. I don't even get a 'hi' from my brother. In fact, I dont even get a 'hi' from my sister and we live in the same house.

"And we've been talking every day since she apologized. Even like talking on the phone. She's even visiting later during my summer break!" Calum exclaims, with a bright smile that could light up the whole room. Not even just the room, his smile lights up my whole world.

Of course, I am extremely happy that he is in contact with his sister again. But, no matter how childish this sounds; it's not fair that he gets a loving, stable, great relationship with his sister and I dont. I haven't done anything wrong to my siblings or to anyone to deserve this. I've been completely loyal and nothing but generous to everyone I've ever talked to. What did I do?

"Hey, are you okay Ainslee?" Calum asks me, reaching out to put his large hand on my shoulder. I hesitantly nod slowly.

I dont want to ruin his joyous mood just because of my personal family problems. I'm not the kind of cruel person to do that to someone. Especially not to Calum.

"You dont look okay, Hun." Calum retorts back with a soft, gentle voice; as if he is afraid he is going to break me if he speaks too loud.

"I'm okay, Calum." I reply with a shaky voice. "I just - can we please go back to my house?"

He nods slowly as we both stand up to go back to my house.