Romantic One Shots & Imagines

One Shot #40: 10 Things I Miss About You

     Cooking dinner feels like a chore again, now that I have no one else to make it for. What am I saying? It was all his fault! Why would I want to cook him dinner? Trying to blanket my sadness and guilt with empowerment only lasted for a few minutes. After a while, I wasn't even looking at the TV as I ate. I was sitting in front of it, but I wasn't looking. The memories just kept breaking through the walls that I put up...tried to put up.

     The sound of the doorbell sprang me back to reality. Lazily, I opened the door only to meet the foggy coolness of the night air. A sudden shot of fearlessness overcame me as I stepped out to look around. On the ground was a card in a white envelope. Inside, it read:

          "1.) I miss how you would wait up for me even though I would call, telling you that I'd be coming home late. Even though I was exhausted by the time I got home, you somehow, comforted me until I fell asleep." The message was printed in a font as if from a typewriter. The rest of the card was blank, giving no clues as to where it came from.

     About to turn back into the house, I hear a scratching sound coming from my driveway. I figure it was my neighbor's cat clawing at the fence. Stepping out to check on her, the sound suddenly stops. Upon investigation, however, I find another crisp, clean envelope.

          "2.) I miss your eyes, the first things I fell in love with. No one rocks mutated genes like you rock heterochromia." I allow myself a second to laugh before I stifle it.

     I clutched tighter to my sweater as the breeze began to pick up. The whistling sound of the wind passing through the trees and bushes gave off an eerie feeling. Despite that, I stood there in the middle of my drive way. For what? I hadn't known until my answer followed the pattern of the air and fell upon my feet. I bent down to pick up the next card.

          "3.) I miss the way you made me laugh. None of my closest friends, brothers, sisters, parents, pets, etc. could make me laugh the way you did. The weird sense of humor that only you and I shared created some of my favorite memories."

     Was it wrong to feel numb? I didn't know what to feel. I was conflicted. My mind and heart were at war, trying to decide my next move. Should I let him get to me? Should I stay outside waiting for another message? What do I do if I find another? Deciding to wait outside a bit longer, I walk around my back yard. After what felt like 10 minutes of no luck, I made my way back inside.

     If I missed it, I don't know what would have happened. If I would have carried on with whatever came on after Jeopardy, brushed my teeth and went to bed. If I would have done all of that without spotting that familiar envelope placed gently on my shelf between a box of tissues and a candle. Placed not quite in plain sight yet not quite hidden. Somehow the logic of finding another one inside my house, this time, did not phase me as strange.

          "4.) I miss the way you didn't care how I was the one that was deathly scared when we watched scary movies together and the way you took me into your arms."

     The memories of our first date at the movies flood back like a rush of waves. Unable to swim away, I let them take me under. The prick of tears start to burn before they even fall down my face. Did he know I would cry? Regardless, the card was conveniently and thankfully, placed by the tissues. Worn out physically and mentally, I walk to my room. The darkness engulfed me as I didn't bother to turn on the lights. I let my body flop down onto the bed and to my surprise, I heard a crunch. Scared, I immediately hop up and turn on the lights. My bed is scattered with more cards. Five to be exact.

          "5.) I miss the way you read. The look of concentration on your face as you traveled to the world of another was fascinating. Also the weird positions I would find you in and the strange places you would choose to read in were always hilarious."

          "6.) I miss your hand in mine. Whether it was walking to McDonald's or laying on the couch staring at our cell phones. When we were intertwined, I knew we were alright."

          "7.) I miss your selflessness. In a world of greed and stealing, I've never found anyone who was as passionate about giving back as you."

          "8.) I miss seeing your smile. Your eyes would squint and flicker with glints of pure peace as happiness spread across your whole face."

          "9.) I miss waking up next to you. Never did I once think that would end."

     I read and re-read each one. Unable to let go, I held onto the last card. The same breeze from outside sent chills down my spine. I got up to find its origin. I stopped dead in my tracks as I saw my back door open. Cautiously, I walked out into my backyard. Yards away, up on my hill, I saw the silhouette of a familiar figure. He was pacing back and forth. The sunset was his backdrop. Slowly yet eagerly, I climbed my way to the top of the hill.

     He noticed as I made my way, but he only quickened his pace. It wasn't until I was standing at the top, equal to him, did he stop. His eyes were glassy, almost bloodshot. Seeing him again in months sent pricks and pangs through my veins and to my heart, attacking it with each blow. It almost burned. I tried my best to hold back the tears. For a moment, I was doing a good job at it too.

     Without words, he handed me the tenth and last envelope. Slowly and tenderly, I broke the seal and opened the card. In his handwriting, "10.) Most of all, I miss the way you loved me".

The End.