A New Family (A Ghost Bird Story)

Getting a New Family

My dad left us for a new family after his business trips started getting longer and longer. He and my mother screamed at each other every night so I guess I shouldn't be surprised. Her abuse of me only got worse after he was gone, not that he ever stopped her when he was here. But she was even more angry, and that anger was directed at me.

Then she met Marc. Marc is great. To me. Which makes my life a living hell. Her punishments have gotten a little less often, to coincide with Marcs business travels, and a whole lot more severe. She put off the blame for all of my old scars on my father. I agreed with her and Marc believed us.

*Flashback*

Marc sat me down to talk to me about becoming a family. He had just become engaged to my mother and he and his son Ryan were moving in with my mother, Marie and I. He really is a good guy and wants to protect us from our abusive PAST with my father.

"Love, you are safe with me here. You know that right?" Marc asked me solemnly.

I nodded earnestly, knowing that that was true... I was safe, when he was HERE.

Marc wrapped an arm around me stating "I won't let anyone hurt you again, Sang"

I looked at him sadly, "that's not something anyone can promise, Marc. Don't take the responsibility of the world on your shoulders."

"You are a part of my world now! You, your mother, Ryan and Marie."

I saw movement behind him as he said this last sentence and looked up to see my mother, red with rage. I thought back over what was said. I had been careful with what I said but Marc had named me before her as part of his world. Not good.

I waited all evening in fear but nothing happened. My guard started to slip as the evening wore on and my new family all said goodnight. I went to the bathroom and drew a bath with some light classical music playing. I lay back feeling surprisingly good about the day. My mother hated me and as far as I could remember always had. Marie wanted nothing but my downfall and would do anything to get me into trouble. Ryan, he was a new entity but he was something to look out for, he had that same dead look in his eyes as my mother sometimes got. But Marc wanted me happy even if no one else in the house did.

Suddenly I felt a hand on either shoulder and I was being forced underwater. I thrashed and panicked. I could see my mother's happy face through the violent water and bubbles. Bubbles? ... My bubbles, My AIR. I was going to drown. My mother was going to kill me in a bathtub! I clamped my eyes shut. I didn't want to see her kill me, I didn't want to see her so happy that I was going to die.

She shook me, cracking my head against the bottom of the porcelain tub. Finally she pulled my head out of the water. I gasp as my head broke the surface, hearing "...king slut! Bitch! You WHORE!!!" She screeched right in my ear. "You think you can ruin this too? You are the one that drove your father away. I will get rid of you before I let you whore yourself to Marc and ruin this for the rest of us"

My head went under the water again and again. Each time I came up for air I met with the same bitter diatribe. At the end I was coughing up water rather than gasping for air. I am sure if she had held me under one more time I would have drown.

She threw me to the side of the bathtub cracking my head again, this time against tile and left me there alone with my lungs searing. I reached over and drained the tub not wanting water anywhere near me. I crawled out to my towel and pulled it down off of the counter. I wrapped it around myself and shook. I finally stood and was immediately back on my knees in front of the toilet throwing up a stomach full of bathwater.

I grabbed the cup next to the sink and filled a swallow full of water and took two ibuprofen. I peeked around the door and hurried across the hall to my room shutting and locking the door behind me. I grabbed the warmest pajamas that I could find and slid under the blanket on my bed and quaked with cold and fear. Was she trying to kill me or just send me a message? How could I control how someone else treated me?

I finally calmed down and warmed up falling into an exhausted, fitful sleep and dreamt of drowning. When I woke gasping for air I remembered and cried. This is normal. Does everyone deal with this every day? You see happy people all the time... But I appear happy, or I try to. Marc being here makes it safer and more dangerous I just have to find a way to walk that line a little on the safer side. I can do this.

The next morning I snuck back over to the bathroom. I didn't want to risk waking anyone up this early, or ever. The carpet was still a little damp from my near drowning. I put another towel down and soaked up the wettest parts. I looked in the mirror and saw my rats nest of hair. I brushed it as best I could, trying to stay away from the bruises. There was one of the back of my head and one blossoming on the side of my head and forehead. I looked in the cabinet at Maries makeup but it was all a few shades darker than my pale skin. There was no use in trying to cover it with that and I had none of my own. I left my hair down trying to obscure the bruise on the side of my head a little bit. My mother wouldn't care or notice but Marc might.

I took two more Ibuprofen and grabbed the wet towels to take downstairs to the laundry room. By the time the wash cycle was done I was making breakfast. Something my mother had decided was "normal" and needed to be done on days when Marc was home. Marc walked into the kitchen having slept soundly due to his sleeping pills with my mother walking in behind him. He looked over at me and gasped. He rushed over and brushed my hair off of my face and behind my left ear revealing a dark black and purple bruise.

"What happened love?" Marc asked. I flinched from the look on my mother's face and Marc groaned in sympathy.

I shrugged "Oh, nothing... I slipped in the shower and bumped my head. Really it is nothing!" I stated firmly.

"This is not NOTHING Sang! This is serious head trauma. Emily we should take her to the hospital and get her checked out..."

My mother stepped forward with a concerned look on her face that was almost believable except for the dead, warning look in her eyes. I hunched in a little then straightened. Marc couldn't see me looking like I was afraid of her.

"Oh, Sang. Sunshine." She crooned "How does it feel?" she brushed lightly against my head.

It was so out of character that my mouth almost fell open. "Its fine... mom. Really. I took some ibuprofen and I can hardly feel it" I was lying through my teeth but Marc couldn't read me very well yet and mother was blocking most of my highly readable face.

"There is my good girl... Marc, she has survived through so much. I think she could get pushed in front of a bus and still bounce back!" She glared at me spitefully and ran her hands through my hair as she said the last sentence. At the last word she pressed viciously on the invisible bruise on the back of my head underneath my hair.

Tears sprang to my eyes but I nodded at Marc. He rushed forward and grabbed my hands, slightly shunting my mother to the side. "Sang, you have had enough bruises and scars to last a lifetime! I don't want to see anymore. Ever. Do you hear me? No slipping in the shower or even skinning your knee. I know I can't protect you from everything, I just want to see you safe and happy!"

"Thanks Marc, I will do everything I can to be safe" I looked at my mother and then added "and good" She nodded slightly but I knew I had a few punishments coming just from this one conversation. Good wasn't really in my control, it had to do more with how Marc treated me. But I knew that after this morning she would be getting more creative with her punishments. Less visible maybe but that didn't mean they wouldn't scar me.