Intoxication Paranoia And A Lot Of Fame.

Chapter 8.

Kellin’s POV.

Just as I opened the door and stepped into the studio, I heard whistling and howling from my band mates. I smiled widely and bowed sarcastically, before closing the door behind me and sitting down. Jesse and Gabe shared a high-five and Justin grinned widely.

“What’s going on?” Mike asked, his brows raised in confusion. Gabe seized the opportunity and stood up, pointing to me with a dramatic gesture. “I have the honour to announce that this man right there, Mr. Kellin Quinn, has got laid last night,” he said, before sitting back down. It made Jack and Jesse laugh loudly and Gabe was just smiling widely, whilst I was shaking my head, a small smile playing on my lips.

“So, who’s the lucky one?” Jaime asked, leaning his elbow on the table and rested his chin in his hand, pretending he was really interested. He wanted to know, but just so he could tease me a bit with it. “Her name’s Linda,” I just said and shrugged. Jaime then widened his eyes and smiled cheekily. “Interesting name! Is she Mexican?” he asked. I shook my head with a grin. “Spanish,” I answered, but he thought it was close enough. He started to shout random words and phrases in Spanish, just because he could.

I caught Vic’s eye and he looked at me like there was something completely wrong. His sad, dark brown eyes locked themselves with mine and I couldn’t look away. It was like he was really sad but at the same time disappointed. I hadn’t even done anything to him?

Jaime then stood up so he could reach my shoulder. “So, you’re not gay?” he asked, all serious. I looked at him and frowned, laughing a bit. “No, of course I’m not, why would you even think that?” I asked, maybe a bit too quickly. I had been taking note of the weird feelings that had been lurking in the back of my head; I did notice how my stomach would do small flick-flacks whenever Vic said something; I was perfectly aware that I often caught myself staring dreamingly at him. But that didn’t mean I was gay.

“Oh I just kinda figured, since you haven’t banged any chicks whilst I’ve known you. But hey, now you have, so you’re definitely not gay,” Jaime said, mostly joking, pointing at me and then laughing. I shook my head with a grin and caught Vic’s eye once again. He was the only one who wasn’t joking around, being happy that I’d been getting some or just making jokes about me being gay. He looked up as he felt my gaze on him and I felt my draw drop a bit as he sent me a glance so filled with anger and despite that I was left in shock. He got up without breaking our eye contact and left the room without anyone but me noticing.

I sat down heavily on my chair, feeling oddly empty inside. Why did he make me feel like I had done something wrong? All I had done was trying to get rid of the weird feelings he was causing, by ‘banging a chick’ as Jaime so delicately put it. I really didn’t get why he would be angry with me for that and least of all disappointed. What did he expect from me? What did he want from me?

As I decided it wouldn’t hurt to try and talk to him, I got up and left the room with some lame excuse. The others could play with the song or something, recording some more instruments now that both the singers were gone. I stopped right outside the closed door and frowned as I realised I had no idea where Vic had gone. I decided to take a wild guess and went for the roof.

I proved my guess to be correct: he was sitting close to the edge, looking down at the streets under him. I walked over to where he was sitting and just watched him for a while. He had a pen in his hand and wrote something on the grey stone wall that kept him from tipping over the edge. I couldn’t see what it was.

“Vic,” I just said, after having watching him for a bit. His head snapped up at the sound of my voice and he turned around to look at me in surprise. He probably didn’t think I’d find him or even follow him. The look of surprise on his face quickly changed to something I can best describe as disappointed, angry and closed. He frowned and crossed his arms, clearly telling me that I was pretty unwanted.

When he finally spoke, his voice was rough and low, and I could easily tell he was mad at me. No doubt there. “Why did you follow me?” he asked. I sighed deeply and sat down next to him without asking permission. “You’re angry with me,” I just pointed out, ignoring his question, which made him snort and laugh humourlessly. “Stating the obvious there, Kellin,” he said. Whenever he didn’t call me by some random nickname, there was really something wrong.

“Could you please tell me what I did wrong?” I asked, turning to look at him. He was staring blankly at nothing at all, completely avoiding looking at me. I bit my lip as my stomach made an uncomfortable backflip, trying to calm it down.
“No,” he then just said, almost spitting out the word. I frowned at him, since I didn’t understand him at all. What had I ever done to him? “Come on, Vic,” I said, reaching out to touch his shoulder.

I shouldn’t have done that. “Don’t touch me!” he snapped and pushed my arm away. I stared at him, once again in shock. I really had no idea what was going on, but it made me rather uncomfortable. He got up quickly and left, leaving me completely confused and speechless. I really just wish he’d tell me what I had done wrong, because I couldn’t handle it if he hated me. I honestly wanted to just hold him in my arms, and right now I didn’t care how gay that seemed.

I looked down at what he had been writing with his pen on the grey brick wall, the words barely visible, but I was able to make it out: True love comes from more than just the heart.