Phan- You and Me (completed)

Chapter 14: Our brave step

~4 months later~

Dan's POV

"I'm not uploading it"

"Phil, I'm takingthe mouse, you are uploading it"

We were seated in front of Phil's laptop, half way through uploading (or rather: debating about the stop of the uploading of) our coming out video. We decided in unison that, after five months of relationship, it was time to share our happiness with the world. Although, I have to admit that happiness wasn't exactly the emotion that would describe Phil in the given moment. There was a lot at the stage for both of us, but I started to feel bad for lying, not only to our fans, but to our friends as well. Feelings don't blossom in the shadows, I've been playing the hiding game long enough to know that. It was an important step- but we had to take it, to make us official.I got tired of not being able to hold his hand or give him a loving look in public. It was a normal thing, people got into relationships every second- and didn't need to deny it. Just because we were YouTubers, didn't mean we shouldn't be allowed a piece of this normality in our lifes, which are extraordinary in about every other occasion.

Phil came up with the idea that he could upload the video on the 10th anniversary of his channel, as a special surprise for the fans. Allas, his excitement about it didn't last very long...I've never seen him being so nervous while filming before. He actually made me change my outfit three times, for no obvious reason whatsoever, other than my black shirt/grey cardigan combo seemed to fit best to his blue plaid shirt (we spend almost an hour picking that). We changed the setting four times, settling eventually in his bedroom. The title took another hour ("Meet my boyfriend!",in case you were wondering).

"It's stupid, isn't it?" And obviously, we weren't through with the topic yet. "oh and I should have edited the kiss out, right? That was just too much,right? Give me the mouse-" Phil lend forward to snatch the mouse away from me, but my reaction speed was quicker. "It's perfect"I assured him, while pushing him gently back in his chair. Phil gave me a pleading look. He was not enjoying this one single bit. I became a little nervous as well, although out of complete different reasons..reasons that Phil would soon enough understand. "What if they don't like it?" "They will love it, Phil. They love you. And I love you, too" My boyfriend bit his lip and gave me an apologizing look. In the 4 months of our relationship he hadn't said it back. Maybe I'm supposed to be hurt or pissed up by these circumstances, but the thing we had was too precious to ruin it with pressure. And if I have to wait forever, and if he never says it back, it dosn't matter. I kind of knew he felt it, that's all that matters, right?

"Besides- they predicted our relationship long before you were even aware of my feelings for you" I ruffled his raven hair to cheer him up - insecure Phil was not the Phil I wanted to spend the rest of the day with. My boyfriend / best friend chewed on his lower lip with eyes fixed on the screen. "It's up"he breathed out. "There's no turning back now" I shut the laptop gently and took Phil's phone out of his hands (He was already checking twitter for comments), turned it off and put it in my pocket. There was another time to deal with the reactions, but it wasn't today. "It was the right choice, Phil." "I hope you're right"

"You know me long enough-" I started and pulled his chair in front of me- "To be aware of the fact-"I cupped his sulky face with my hands. "That I, Daniel James Howell; Memelord, best friend and love of your life, Phillip Michael Lester-" Phil couldn't help but laugh at my, to be fair, quite fitting attribution of myself. "Am always right" I finished my sentence with a little kiss on his nose. "So you stop pouting and start being proud of us"

"It's not that I'm not proud-"

"There, so there's no problem! Glad we're on the same page"I flashed Phil one of my famous 'Ha, I just outsmarted you' grins. "I hate it when you do that", he mumbled, crossing his arms over his chest like a little child whose been caught telling lies. Heavens, one day I get a heart attack from this adorableness. "No you don't. I can see you're smiling" Phil started to giggle,probably remembering the first time he heard those words (From Sans to Papyrus in our second Undertale adventure). In this moment of unattendance, I had enough time to tackle hug him; sending us, as well as our chairs straight to the ground.