Invisible

Chapter 17

Josh

"Babe who's Amanda" asked Erica. I turned to see her standing there. Fuck this bitch can't come back into my life she's completely fucked me over more than once I thought. "We need to sit down and talk baby I need to explain Amanda to you" I said and she looked scared. "Josh honey what's going on" said my mom as all three of us walked in. "Matt found out Amanda is in town and looking for me" I said. My mother was instantly pissed and so was my dad. "Fuck" Sara said under her breath. "If she tries anything I'll hurt her" she said with venom in her voice.
They all had reason to hate her. She wrecked me emotinally and physically for years. "Um can someme explain what's going on" said Erica sounding scared as hell. I took her hand but couldn't find my voice. "Amanda is Josh's ex she got him into a lot of bad shit back in Canada and it took us a long time to get him better" said Sara. Erica looked at me and squezzed my hand to get me to look at her. "Are you ok" she asked and nodded my head. "Sara can you explaim I don't think I can" I said. "Josh was 15 when he met her amd before her he was a good kid got good grades then all of sudden evsrything changed. She got him into herion and when sje broke up with him he started cutting then she took him back but always started fights with him and made him think he was fat even though he wasn't so he developed an eating disorder as well as the cutting and herion. When we found out we sent him to rehab he was 16 by then and it took a couple trips to rehab for him to get better. By the time he turned 17 he was on the right track again. Him and Matt had started a band back home but then Matts parents moved him down here. We were afraid that amanda would come back and he'd go off track again so dad found a job down here that paid just as well as back home and we moved. We haven't seen or heard from here since and I don't kmnow why she's back" said Sara. I was almost crying now but I held the tears back. It wasn't because of Amanda I was afraid that once Erica found out what a fuck up I was she'd leave me.
I felt her wrap her arms around my waist and hug me tight. I wrapped my arms around her holding onto her like she would just slip away. "Thank you for telling me Sara" she said. "Momma Ramsay is it ok of I sleep in Joshs room I don't think he should be alone right now" she asked my mom and my mom nodded an ok. She grabbed my hand and we started to go towards the stairs she stopped to gove Matt a hug. "Thank you for being there for him" she said and we headed to bed. "Let's try to get some sleep baby that was a lot to take in for both of us" she said and we got in under the covers and she cuddled into me and held her tight.

Joshs Dream

"Hey cutie what's your name" she said walking up to me. I looked up to see a beautiful red head with hazel eyes. "I'm Josh what about you" I said. She smiled and sat down next to me "I'm Amanda" she said.we sat there and talked for a while when she had to go we exchanged numbers so we could text. We talked almost none stope for three days and I finally got the courage to ask her out. When she said yes I was ecstatic. The beginning of our relationship was great thwn she had me skipping school. And I wasn't to sure about it but she was my first girlfriend and I didn't want to disappoi t her so I did it. We went out one night and sat at the lake. She had gotten a text while we were there. "Hey babe wanna go to a party" she asked I thought about it since it was a school night o was going to decline and she knew it. "Please baby it'll be fun" she whispered in my ear and then nibbled my ear lobe. "Ok let's go" I said and instantly regreted it. I had a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach as we headed down town. This was a really bad place but I was with her so I was good. As soon as we got to the house there cars everywhere even parked in the grass.
She squezzed my hand and smiled at me walking through the door. Instead of saying hi to anyone she pulled me through the house and down the stairs to the basement. When we got to the bottom I got a really bad feeling cause there were people all over but they were just laying there lookijng off into space. We got around the corner and there was a man sitting at a table. "Amanda baby I didn't think you'd make it before we ran out" he said smiling. That instantly had me not likeing the guy. I tightened my grip on her hand. "Amanda can we go" I whispered in her ear. "Oh come on baby do one hit with me if you don't like the feeling you don't have to do it anymore" she said rubbing her body against mine I couldn't help it I was a guy and she was hot so I gave in. Trying it once couldn't hurt right. So I nodded my head and she turned to the guy never saying his name. "I want to this time" she said and he handed the stuff over to her. "What is it" I asked as she was helping me. "Its herion babe it'll make you feel amazing" she said and I took the hit. It felt like the weight was lifted from my shoulders and everything was ok. "Like it baby" she said as she took hers and I nodded. The next few months felt like they just flew by after that party. I had started going to get it with out her and hiding it in my room.
She caught me there one day and we got in a fight. "God your so pathetic and worthless. Look at you fatty what do I even see in you" she screamed in my face and I could smell alcohol on ber breath but I thought I was in love with her. I tried losing weight the normal way but it didn't work. I ended up becoming bulimic. But she didn't care she texted me and broke up with me. I tried drowning myself in the herion but it didn't work and one day I picked up the razor sitting on my counter and ran it across my arm. It stung at first but after the inital sting it felt so good so I made three more cuts. I could hear a knock on my door so I cleaned everything up and hid the evidence and pulled my sleeves down. "What" I said swining the door open to find my sister standing there. Josh what's going on, you've lost so much weight you look sick and your not going to school Matt hasn't seen or heard from you in a month what's going on" she said. I knew she was just worried but still being on my high from the herion and the cuts I didn't care. "Nine of anyones damn buisness I'm perfectly fine" I said. I didnt realize how bad I had cut myself and how much blood I was losing until I collapsed on the floor and heard Sara scream.

Erica

"Josh...honey wake up please" I said shaking his shoulder. Slowly he opened his eyes. His breathing quick like he had a nightmare. "Josh baby are you ok" I said hugging him to me his head on my chest as I rocked slightly back and forth. He gripped onto me tight as he tried to even out his breathing. Once he had it evened out he seemed to be ok but he still had me in his arms as tight as he could and I was fine with that. "I dreamt of when I was on herion and cut and was bulimic. The first time I cut Sara came to my room amd I didn't realize how bad I had cut myself I collapsed in front of her. That was my first trip to rehab" he said starting shake. "Its ok honey just a distant memory. Your better and keep gettimg better everyday" I said tightening my hold on him. "I love you Josh always remember that" I said. He looked to my eyes and smiled. I couldn't help but smile to. "Do you want to try and sleep more or watch a movie" I said. "Let's watch a movie I don't think I can get back to sleep after that" he said and got up to pick out a movie for us to watch.