Million Dollar Dreams

Chapter 16

I had a good feeling, for once, about all this. I knew Braxton wasn't going to get away with any of this. I'm still worried though about Lisa Marie. Something about her mysterious absence was strange, she didn't just disappear out of the blue. I didn't want to believe she'd do it, but deep down, I was hoping it was her. I wouldn't blame her either, there were times I thought of doing the same thing, she just had the balls to do it. But, I wanted to make sure she was safe, and her not answering her phone wasn't making me believe that she was. I had told Kirk every last detail about the last time I seen her, and he was convinced she did. The timing was too perfect for it not to be.

Tomorrow I was going to testify in court, as well as Delia and my mom. I wasn't quite ready for everything, Christopher was coming over today, about noon time, to go over everything one last time. I know what he's going to ask me, and how I should answer, but when I'm nervous, it all goes right out the window, and I'm nervous now just thinking about it.

The part about this that bothered me most was having to open up in front of all these people, including Kirk. Even though he knew, even my mother knew, and his mother, there were still some things they didn't know. I've never been the type to share personal things, I'm full of bottled up emotions. It's not because I'm secretive, but I feel like if I poured my heart out I'd sound pitiful, or looking for your sympathy, maybe even bothering you with my problems. That's the last thing I want is to be a bother.

I started to think back to the days I tried to erase from my mind, but never was able to. I started to reconnect my feelings from them, and bring them back. I figured the more emotional I was in court, the better. Even if I didn't try to channel back the emotions, is still be crying like a baby in court. I'm going from hardly ever talking about it, to saying everything as once. I wasn't only opening up about Braxton, but Kirk as well. I knew I was going to get slammed with questions by Braxton's lawyer that'll make him look bad. Digging into someone's past isn't always pretty, matter of fact, to the prosecution, they might just find gold.

There were things our mothers didn't know about us as a couple. Though I lost my virginity to Braxton, not very willingly, but I still did, Kirk was always the guy I ran to when something was wrong. They knew we were together a lot, and we were close, but they don't understand the connections we had. I'm pretty sure Delia never knew that every girl he dated in high school he didn't have sex with, well, let me rephrase that. Every girl he dated in high school, the sex was meaningless, it was just... well, sex. He's tell them I'm going out with the boys tonight and come see me instead, that's when he had meaningful sex, with me. His mother always said she despises a man that cheats, which is a huge reason why she never knew. My mom swore I was virgin till I got pregnant, but she was just being naive, she knew what was going on, she wanted to ignore it, figuring it'd all be a dream when she pinched herself.


* flashback *


********


I was laying on my bed, only in my bra and panties, watching the fan as it spun in crazy fast circles, creating a cool breeze against my hot skin. Maybe going for a run in July wasn't such a good idea. I reached over for my bottle of water, taking a huge sip. Then, I heard a knock of my door.

"Come in." I yelled out, looking over to see who was about to enter my room. Kirk smiled as he walked in past the threshold. I had no desire to cover up my half naked body, he's seen me with nothing on already, so what was the point?

"Hey Lexus." He laid down next to me. "You look tired."

"I am." I said. "I went for a run.."

"Right now? It's almost seven."

"Yeah I know, I was bored, so what else was I gonna do?"

"You could have came seen me." He slid over closer to me. I turned over to my side, facing him.

"You were with Vanessa though, it would be too awkward with your girlfriend there."

"So? She knows we're friends. You could have made up an excuse or something." I chuckled, rolling my eyes.

"Come on, that's just dumb. I see you all the time, and it was nice to run and get everything off my mind, I might actually sleep tonight." I yawned, trying to keep my eyes opened.

"Your mom just left as I walked in, she's going to work."

"You're right, she's working third shift tonight, even better." I smiled. "It'll be very quiet tonight."

"Do you mind if I stay with you? I have no where else I'd rather be." He reached his hand up to my face, caressing my cheek with his thumb. His hands were soft, his skin just perfect, not one blemish, pimple or marks, just pure perfection. My heart was skipping beats from the way he touched my face.

"Kirk... This isn't right, you're with Vanessa." I spoke softly, in a sort of guilty tone.

"You said that about Tammy and Caroline." He rolled his eyes. "Why can't I stay with you?"

"I didn't say you couldn't stay.. I do want you to stay, I don't wanna sleep alone in this big bed." I pouted out my bottom lip. "But you're taken."

"Yeah, but it's not serious, at any level. My hearts already taken, I don't need any other girl." He pulled himself closer to me, I could feel his body heart start to sink into mine. He pressed his forehead slightly against mine. "Lexus.. It's you, and will always be you. I don't know if you realize how much you mean to me."

"Kirk, please don't do this.." I whispered, not looking him in the eyes. "Don't sweet talk me, please."

"I'm not." He kissed the tip of my nose, then placed his lips near mine. "I love you Lexus."

My heart stopped, literally, for three beats. My chest felt like it was going to cave in. I looked up slowly at Kirk's face, his eyes already fixed on mine. His eyes said it all, the way he touched me, the way he said my name, the way he kissed me, and the way he made love to me proved it all. But love, I'm incapable of keeping. It dawned on me that one day this was all going to be over. There was never going to be a Kirk and Lexus, or a Mrs. Randle, no big family and a big house, not one dream nor a dollar to our names, that's what we had. But I knew Kirk was something special, he had million dollar dreams of the life he wanted to live, he says they include me, but those kind of dreams don't involve a head case like me, but it was a beautiful thought to keep in my mind.

"I love you too." I managed to spit out. At first I was scared to say it, but damn it, I couldn't hide it in anymore. It felt good to finally say it.

Before I knew what was going on, he was already on top of me, his hand trailing down my curves, resting on my hips, playing with the top of my panties. My mind went blank, the only thing I was focused on was his hands. The way he touched me sent goosebumps to the top of my skin. To the touch, I was hot, but on the inside, I was boiling up, so hot with lust that I couldn't think of any other thing. I wanted him to sweep me off my feet, I wanted a fairy tale love story, but most of all, I wanted him, all of him.

I ran my nails up his back, lifting up his shirt. I was so desperate to get all his clothes off and get down to business, yet at the same time I wanted it to go slow, and maybe never end. His skin against mine felt so pleasing. My fingers running through his hair, his hands touching every part of me, our legs interlocked with each others, this is what love feels like, and this is what I want forever. In a way, this was my million dollar dream. To love, and to be loved, but only by Kirk. What a wonderful dream it was to me.

But now, how do I keep him? No one is known to stay forever. I knew one day is figure it out, maybe I'd have to stick around and wait, or do I make a move? Maybe he'd realize I'm not all that great and he'll leave, but maybe he'll stay, I wanna think that he will, but reality is never what you want. And a dream is only a dream, it's no where close to reality, trust me.


*******

A knock came from the front door, I looked over at Kirk and smiled. He knew what I meant. Go get the door, my eyes said to his, they rolled and he got up to answer the door. I had a good idea of who it was.

Christopher walked in, wearing regular clothes. I'm so use to seeing him in a suit that it was weird for me to see him in street clothes. He shook my head, sitting beside me. Kirk went inti the Kitchen, probably to get us a drink. He was good like that.

"How are you and your little girl feeling?" He asked, smiling down at the bump in my shirt. Day by day I was growing noticeably, you could tell I was very pregnant.

"We're both great." I smiled back. "But nervous about tomorrow."

"Don't be! It's easy as pie!"

"I don't know how to make pie..." I mumbled to myself. "Do you want to go sit out on the back porch? It's a lot nicer out there."

"Sure thing." He said, taking his notepad out of his briefcase. "Lets go."

He followed my out past the sliding glass doors an onto the back porch. The wind was still, the sky seemed to stay in one place, the sun in a perfect spot behind a thin, non moving cloud, the only one in the sky. It was hot at all, for once, it wasn't so humid outside. We sat down beside each other, he opened up to the page my questions were on, as well as answers.

"This isn't going to be easy," He assured me. "But I'll be right in front of you the whole time, so follow my lead. Sound good?"

"Yeah...." I took a deep breath in, exhaling out slowly. "Sounds good."

"Let me start off with the questions I'm going to ask. I'll start off with the basics, state your name, and relationship to Kirk. Blah, blah, blah. I wanna start off with your relationship with him so the judge knows he's a good guy, he treats you good, and has always had your back. Then we'll bring up some stuff about Braxton, and I know you hate to talk about it but-"

"It's for Kirk." I interrupted. "I know."

"Exactly.. It's gonna be emotional for you, so it's better to be over prepared than to go in blind folded, right?" I nodded yes. "I'm gonna ask when you and Braxton dated, how old, and when did things go wrong. Also, the abuse, it's important the judge knows who he really is, and make sure that influences his final call. Oh, and go into details as much as it hurts, a story is better told emotions and detail, not monotone sadness, no one will wanna listen. Dramatic is always good, trust me."

"I can handle that." I nodded, trying to process every word he said into my brain. I was struggling to find a space in my mind where I could cram all the information in. I dug deep into my memory bank, making sure it wouldn't budge and stay in it's right place. I got this, I told myself, no need to worry.

"Lexus, one last thing."

"What is it?"

"When his lawyer cross examines you, be ruthless. Don't give into what he's asking you. He ask you yes or no questions, don't be afraid to elaborate, go on and on. Put up a fight, again, be dramatic. Everything you say the judge hears, remember that." He put his hand on my shoulder. "I'm sure you'll do just fine Lexus, seriously. You both have nothing to worry about."

"Thank you." I smiled, standing up at the same moment he did. "You can stay for lunch if you want. I smell something, I'm pretty sure Kirk cooked something up."

"Nope, but thank you very much. I ate before I came. I'll see you both in the morning. Have a great evening."

I walked him to the door. He shook my hand before leaving, trying to act professional. I waved to him as he backed up out of the driveway. That good feeling I had before, was reappearing again in my gut.

"Are you all ready for tomorrow?" Kirk said with a plane face. I could tell he was tense, and more nervous for me than I was.

"Yes babe, I'm ready." I grabbed his face, kissing him on the lips. "It'll be a piece of cake."


- - -


I walked into the courthouse with the mindset of payback and sweet dear karma. Though I was nervous, I wasn't scared, but I was anxious. I had a mix of nerves and excitement, creating an amazing adrenaline rush that made me feel high with power. I went into that courtroom with closed fist and war paint on. I was strong, and doing what was best for my world, Kirk.

I wasn't actually wearing war paint on my face, I was dressed for the occasion. I wore dress pants, mate runty of course, so the came up to my belly button like momma jeans. Along with the dress pants, I had on a pretty lavender dress top, the sleeves rolled up slightly. I had on basic flats, heels with swollen ankles was a no-no.

Christopher was calling me up first to the stand. All of this felt like I was next in line to go on the biggest, fastest, most dangerous, mind twisting roller coaster known to man. I took the biggest breath in, slowly releasing it. I sat down right behind Kirk and Christopher. Kirk looked back at me and smiled as if saying everything was going to be fine. He mouthed the words "I love you." before he turned back around. I smiled, wanting to say it back, but was saving my voice for the stand.

The judge banged his gavel, court was now in session. As he talked, I zoned out, picturing what was going to happen within the next few minutes. I sent chills down my spine, but I liked it in a way.

"Yes your honor." Christopher stood up. "I'd like to call up Lexus Hernandes to the stand please."

"Very well, Miss Hernandes, come forth."

I stood up slowly, my mom patted my back as I walked by her. I never even noticed anyone sitting next to me, I was in my own little world.

"Raise your right hand." He said. I had my left hand on the bible, then rose my right. "Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth so help you god?"

"I do." I said, my voice a little shaky.

"Can you please state your name and age for the court please?" Christopher walked up to the stands, placing his body still right on front of me.

"My name is Lexus Loraine Hernandes, and I'm 24 years old."

"Can you tell us just about how long you've known Kirk?"

"Most of my life actually, since I was 5 or 6. So almost twenty years."

"That's a very long time. So I'm guessing you know him very very well. Us that true?"

"Yes, that's true." I responded.

"Tell the court your friendship with Kirk, before Braxton was in your life, how was Kirk like?"

"Well, um.. We have been close since we first met really. I was the quite kid in class, he was the funny one that everyone knew, but he was never really a trouble maker. We would do homework together, he got good grades, a lot higher than me. But, overall, he's nice. When I was down, he lifted me up, he gave me life. Kirk showed me the silver lining when my clouds were so dark you couldn't see through them, there was no light of the other side for me. I had nothing, but to him, I was something. Growing up, he was the only person that ever made me feel wanted and like I was an actual human being, not a freak of nature." I paused, looking at Braxton's family members. Not one of them could make eye contact with me. They acted like I wasn't even up here talking. "We were great friends then, and are even closer now." I added.

"Kirk was there for, emotionally. How about physically?"

"Yes, he was here for me in all aspects. At the drop of a hat he'd come to me and help. I'd call him crying and five minutes later he'd be over to see what was wrong. He cares so much, his heart is big and full of love." I smiled over at him. "That's one of his finer qualities."

"He does sound very caring. So, tell me, and everyone else, he cares so much about you, did he ever get violent with you? During an argument did things get out of hand?"

"No. He's never been a violent person. He's been mad, not only at me, but to others that bullied me or pushed me around, but he'd never get violent with then or me. Never."

"You don't consider Kirk violent then?"

"No." I said strongly. "I don't, not one bit."

"Do you love Kirk?"

"I do, an awful lot." I blushed. "I love him more than anything."

"Love is such a powerful thing, don't you agree?"

"I do agree.." I raised an eyebrow. I wasn't sure where he was going with this.

"Love is what brings you here. You love him, and are supporting him and that's great. When he found out of the text messages and the note, how did he react?"

"He was mad, you could see how mad he was by the way he tensed up. His eyes said it all. I've seen the look before, he was angry and seemed hot to touch."

"Did he say anything to you before he left?"

"No actually, he just left."

"Why?"

"His instinct."

"Would you care to elaborate?"

"Him being a man means to protect and to keep me safe. When found out, yes, he was angry, but his intentions are to protect, not to cause any harm. He went over there with making sure I was going to be okay in mind, not I'm gonna go kick his butt. There's a huge difference."

"What was he protecting you from? Or who?"

"Braxton, him right there." I pointed.

"Why? Why is it such a big thing to protect you from him?"

"Because he's bad news... And have only caused me pain and suffering."

"What has he done? Can you explain your relationship with him?" My throat almost dried up, now I was becoming more nervous and less excited. I cleared my throat and took a few breaths.

"Back in high school, we dated, and our relationship was rocky. At first, it was fine, but after a few months he became controlling and very possessive. He wanted things done his way, and any other way was wrong. When I didn't do it the way he liked, at first he'd yell and get mad, then after a while it turned into hitting. It's be a slap, then a punch then eventually a full blown beating. And it only got worse from there.."

"Worse? How so?"

"Burning me with a cigarette, hitting me with objects, like a belt, my own show, a few times with his work boots, and once with a rope, giving me really bad rope burn, I was bleeding and went to to ER that night. I had to sneak out of the house to do so.."

"It sounds to me that your prior relationship was very abusive. How did Kirk handle that?"

"He didn't like it at all, he tried to get me away from Braxton, and have me move back into his house with his family so I'd be safe. But, I was scared at the time and rolled with the punches... Literally."

"Wow.." He said softly. "One last question, since you've known Kirk his whole life, you've seen his good, and his bad's, his highs and his lows, does he really desreve to be pusished for this?"