Paranoid Park (boyxboy)

Mocking Bird

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(Andy's P.O.V.)

When I get home I hear screaming coming from Ally's room and I go running. 

"Mom?" 

She sits there with Ally in her arms, trying to calm her down. 

"What's wrong?" I ask softly.

"She won't sleep or come down," Mom sobs.

She looks exhausted and I feel horrible. I should have stood home today. I knew it was her day off and I still let her talk me into going to see Mikey. 

"Let me get her, Mom". 

"Andy-" 

"Go to sleep, you need it," I say firmly as I lift Ally up.

"O.K." She sniffles.

I watch her shuffle out the room before closing the door. When I go to sit on the bed, Ally writhes in my arms. 

"Ally, calm down, now," I tell her.

She chokes on a sob, tears staining her face, light brown eyes all red and puffy. 

"If you want me to sing to you, you need to calm down." 

She sniffles loudly before nodding and curling up in my arms, green pajamas scraping against my shirt. 

"What song do you want today?" I ask.

"The same one I always ask for," she whispers.

"Wanna' hum the beat for me?"  

"Yeah," she nods.

I wait a while before actually beginning. 

"I know sometimes, things may not make since to you right now, but ay', what Daddy always told you? Straighten up little solider, Stiffen up that upper lip, what you crying about? You got me?" I start.

She hums a little louder. 

"Ally, I know you miss your Mom, and I know you miss your Dad, when I'm gone, but I'm trying to give you the life I never had, but I can you're sad, even when you smile, even you laugh, I can see it in your eyes, deep inside you wanna' cry, cause you're scared, I ain't there, Daddy's with you in your prayers, no more crying, wipe them tears, no more nightmares," I continue, wiping tears from her face as I lay her down.

"We gon' pull together through it, we gon' do it," I smile down at her.

Mikey had no right to say that. It replays in my head as I sing some more of the song to Ally.

"We're all we got in this world, when it spins, when it swirls, when it twirls," I continue.

I tuck the sheet up under her chin and fix her bun as I keep singing and she keeps humming.

I know what I want to do with my fucking life. I always had a plan. I always had to.

"We did not plan it to be this way, you're mother and me, but things have gotten so bad between us, I don't see us ever being together ever again, like we used to be when we was teenagers, but then again everything always happens for a reason, I guess it was never meant to be, and it's just something we have no control over, and that's what destiny is, so no more worries, rest your head and go to sleep, maybe we'll wake up one day and this will all just be a dream," I sing.

But I didn't plan on my Dad leaving me with a broken Mom, even though she doesn't like to show it. I didn't plan on my sister and her boyfriend leaving me with her child, but I still love Ally like she's my own daughter and I always made sure I took care of them.