Unwithered Love

Chapter 19: When Things Fall Apart

Diovi and I knew that we're still too young to be really serious with our relationship. We told ourselves that if we really love each other, we need to prepare ourselves for the future. We both agreed that if we wanted our love to last, we must set some limitations and follow some rules. We had four on the list: Number 1. Trust no matter what! Number 2. No secrets.
Number 3. Meet on weekends only and during special dates.
Number 4. Studies must be priority.

At first, Diovi would not agree with rule number 3. He said disapprovingly, "That would be impossible. We live in the same apartment."

I grinned at him and said, "That's the point, you need to move out and look for another boarding house or I'd move out."

"That's torture!You know my day will never be complete without seeing your pretty face."He raised his brow tugging me with his arm.

"You know, you would thank me for this, believe me.. anyway you have my picture..so you won't miss me that much... and how can we prioritize our studies if we see each other everyday?"

His face was down and he said,"Okay, but if I miss you, I'll come and see you."

"What? That's breaking the rules! See me if you're dying!" I glared at him and laughed.

The next day, I helped him look for a new place, luckily we found a nice place near his college. He was still unhappy about his moving out, but I told him, holding and squeezing his hand, "The more you miss me, the more exciting our meetings then.."

Those rules helped us a lot. We inspired one another to do our best in our studies. Weekends were the most awaited days for us; we had fun helping each other doing our assignments and projects. There were times he would come to help me do the laundry, we would go to the mall and he would patiently accompany me to the bookstores. He even accused me once,that the only reason why I wanted us to meet on weekends so I could have more time reading my romance novels and watch love stories. I would just laugh about it and commented to him, "Your girlfriend would be so romantic and so in love with you after reading all those books."

Everything was falling into places, until one day when I went to his boarding house with my present to surprise him. It was his birthday, but it happened that I had to finish a report and a project that was already due. He was sad about it when I told him I cannot be with him on his birthday. I made a promise that we could celebrate it on the coming weekend. But I wanted to surprise him, I decided to go to him and greet him before doing the report and the project. I was not expecting I would see him with his friends drinking liquor. He was surprised, he did not expect me to come. I gave him my present and sat beside him. I wanted to tell him about the hard drink. It would not be a big issue if it was only beer. I just could not spoil his day in front of his friends. So  I was just listening to their chat while they drink. After a few minutes I told him I had to go because I intend to finish my report and my project that evening. But he begged me to stay for half an hour. I was feeling annoyed because of their none sense talk. He challenged me to take one shot before he allows me to go. I drank it and after a few minutes I felt so dizzy. I did not know how it happened, but I woke up in the morning on his bed. I tried to recall what had happened. I knew that something happened. I remembered that I just allowed it to happen. It was something so hard to resist. I cried, and he too was sorry. But it already happened.

I stopped seeing him for awhile. I just could not believe it happened that way. But worse comes to worst. After a month, my period was delayed. I was so scared that when I told him about it, he too was so scared. He hugged me and he started crying. He told me he was going to help me whatever happens. I did not know what to do. To confirm that feeling, I asked a trusted friend to buy for me a pregnancy test over the counter. And yes, it was positive! I cried and cried..nothing in my mind but fears of facing the problem.

I knew in times like this I have no one to turn to but God. I repented and plead for His forgiveness. I was so ashamed to God, to my parents, to my sister, and to Michael. I was reminded of him. Michael told me not to forget the values and the principles I learned from the Bible. Now my life was destroyed because of my wrong choice.

I wrote to my sister Eunice about my dilemma. I told her my confusion about Diovi. I knew I love him, but I had fear of getting married to him. I was just so scared.

Eunice came over to see me and to talk to Diovi. When she arrived she was crying. I burst into tears when she hugged me. She was sorry and was blaming herself for leaving me. I told her it was all my fault and she should never feel guilty for what had happened to me. But her presence comforted me so much.

The next day Eunice talked to Diovi. They had a heart to heart talk. She wanted to confirm from Diovi if he truly loves me or not. Diovi told her how much he loves me and that it breaks his heart every time he sees me cry. He gave my sister assurance that everything would be okay.
It was almost the final exam for the second semester. Both of us lost our focus on our studies because of our situation.

Right after his exams Diovi went home to tell his parents about me and the baby.  Before he left he hugged me and told me that he loves me. Eunice and I agreed to go home at same day.  I could not sleep at the boat, thinking about my parents. I knew that it will surely break their hearts. When I arrived in the morning, my sister was already there. Mom and dad were surprised to see us. They were not expecting us. They thought we are going to take summer class because that was the original plan. Eunice talked to them first. I was in my room praying and crying. I told myself whatever would be the reaction of my parents I would just accept it. If I need to kneel down before them I would do so, until they forgive me.

After they talked, I heard the cry of my mom. She was saying what would happen to my studies? How could I continue when the baby comes? My heart was breaking hearing their frustrations. When I went out to see them, I was in tears when my dad embraced me and he told me, "You have to be strong. It was your choice, face it and be strong."

I never dreamed of breaking the hearts of my parents. I was a failure, and I could never forgive myself for hurting them so much.

After a week, Diovi came with his parents. They agreed that the wedding would be a civil one. I was excited but at the same time I had great fears. The excitement was on seeing my baby soon and becoming a mother to her, but my fear was on becoming a wife to Diovi. I don't know why,  what I wanted that time was just the support from Diovi. I had fear also that if I refuse to get married what would happen to my baby. So I had no choice. I saw my parents in pain, I don't want to add more pain if they see me being a single mother. I chose to be wed for the sake of my baby. The love for Diovi did not matter anymore.

When everything was prepared.The wedding was realized. It was simple with few relatives. But what painful in my part was seeing my dad so unhappy during the wedding. Yes, he was smiling but his eyes were so sad. I knew he was deeply hurt.
That sad face broke my heart even more. People could see my gleaming smile, but my soul was consumed with sorrow for the pain I have caused to my dear parents.