One After The Other

All The Lonely People

The Beatles once asked a very important question, ¨Where did all the lonely people go?¨ I wondered this very question myself but I think I found the answer as I look around me to see all the smiling faces but most were fake. People hiding from the world who they really were wanting to cry out, to scream, to run away. So I think maybe there all around us and we just can't see it behind the mask they were.

Sam-

"Why did you leave me?" She thought to herself staring at the Black and white photograph of her father. One tear, slowly dripped down her fair skin. Easily the most beautiful and happy person in the school at one glance with her long jet black, curly hair sitting down her perfect back. But know one really knows she feels so alone. The one person in this world who's supposed to truly love you, and then just checks out is heart breaking but she has to hide it because how can you miss someone you don't know? She doesn't know his middle name or his birthday. Every Father's day she has fun day because her family (mom) wants to pretend it okay too and she doesn't need him, she can do the work of two.

But she does miss him even if she never knew him or will never she still just wants to hold on to him and hear him tell her that he loves her, that's her deepest fantasy. Not kissing the boy in her math class or killing her little sister. Just to hear those little words even just one time, even if he didn't mean it. "I love you" would still be everything and she might feel wanted for once. Sam will keep on though being brave and strong because nothing is ever wrong, at least that's what they will all think. Her smile fools everyone and her pointless jokes about her absent father are really a cry for help and when she keeps pushing everyone away and telling them she's okay and everything's fine it's all a lie. She really just wants you to push harder because she does want to tell you and express her true feelings, but she just doesn't know how. She repeats to herself, that everything is okay hoping that one day it will be true because at this point that is all she can do and that is all she knows how to do.

Zara-

She's surviving, at least that's what she tells herself every time she drags the blade across her wrist, every time she looks and the blood drip down her wrist, every time she looks at the old cuts, she tells herself she's surviving. Zara sits in her bathroom every night and wonders when someone will hear her cry and see her pain but for now she keeps on surviving. Using her old shaving razor she pulls up her sleeves and takes in a deep breath, closes her eyes and quickly drags the razor across her arm over and over again till she starts to feel the cooling of blood burst out of her cuts. When she finally looks down to see her work. Zara stares at the blood watching it slowly drip down her arm till hitting the floor with a soft thump. When she hears the sweet sound it makes her forget for a moment that she is without happiness or love.

Rick-

"I just don't understand, I can't keep on a conversation, I can't read emotion, I don't understand when people are joking or being sarcastic, I just don't get it!" Rick whispered off to himself, he seemed angry but if you really listened to his voice you could hear the desperation for human contact and understanding. Rick yearns to feel others emotion especially when it comes to his limited friends and a very special girl which he had liked for some time but he also wanted to understand his own feelings.

Rick noticed that other kids his age also started dating and he envies this, mainly the girl, Rebecca had started dating a boy and for some reason even though he didn't like the boy Rick felt he still needed to be there with her and for her. This also made him feel sort of isolated. Usually he had felt this about most things in his life and he just thought it meant no one liked him but she called him her friend so this was strange and an unfamiliar feeling. Rick felt more alone than ever in these moments and he just didn't know what to do?

Alison-

Alison loved her brother deeply more than any of us may ever know or understand. Even so that she protected him as much as it hurt her. She knew it was wrong for him to abused her and she knew that wasn't real love and it was wrong but he hasn't done it since they were kids and he had apologised but something told her it was wrong to protect him. Even though he had touched her and put his hands on her, she still loved him. So when she heard her mother screaming and the dreaded sirens, she just wanted to crawl away herself. Red light. Green light.Red light.Green light.

She was okay with her mother hating her but not her brother, yelling and cussing at him, it made Alison hate herself even more than her mother did. She shouldn't have told, she felt stupid and foolish. Alison knew her brother would get hurt but she told anyways and she felt selfish. Her mom and now her brother would both resent her and she couldn't bear that.

She Tried to tell people how she felt, Ally would just tell her she was looking for attention and turn her away, Mackenzie was too busy dealing with her own life to even bother but to give her a hug, Sue Tried to be there for her in private but when any one else was around she'd ignore her because she wasn't good enough. And then there was Ray, she would act concerned and tell Alison she was beautiful and everything was okay and give her advice, she told her what Alison already knew that it wasn't right. But in the end it just wasn't enough. None of them cared, none were there, they all put on a show but none really wanted or tried to help her.

Staring at the bottle of painkillers with the thoughts of everyone in the black of her mind screaming at her making it even harder to think, when all she wanted to here was that she wasn't alone. Without a though she quickly opened the bottle pulling one out staring at it.

" I'm sorry" she whispered to it before swallowing each indivisible pill. Till everything went dark.