holding on ; hbr

thirty five

your pov*

i watch hunter having fun on stage. he looked so happy. if felt like everything was in slow motion. i watched his smile grow as i walk on stage.

"MAKE SOME NOISE FOR Y/N" hunter yelled into a microphone

i faked a smile and walked over to him, he grabbed a hold of my hand and everybody screamed. all i wanted right now was to bury myself in blankets and cuddle with hunter.

but i couldnt...

the show finished and we were up to the meet and greet stage. i wasnt in the meet and greet line because most of the girls there didnt know me. a couple of girls did come up to me tho and asked for a picture.

another girl began to approach me, it makes me so happy when people are here to see me. she doesnt really have a smile on her face, maybe a fake smile?

"heyyy" i say putting my hands out for a hug. she doesnt take it.

"hi. can i ask for something?" she says pretty rudely

"uhh sure" i say smiling

"can you give this to loren? i dont have vip" she says handing me a jar in which holds "100 reasons why i love Loren"

my heart sank. could this go any worse... my smile fades.

"yeah sure" i say faking a laugh. i felt like i wad faking everything at this point.

i take the jar and she walks off. just like that, my day got even worse.

the show wad over but hunter was doing signing with the other rowlands. i sat on a couch backstage, scrolling through instagram. i looked up to see blake standing in front of me.

"hey, can i sit?" he says smiling

"yeah" i say with no expression

"are you okay?" he asks with a lot of sympathy in his voice

"yea im fine" i say looking back at my phone

"okay , well ill see you later" he smiles and leaves.

how could he be so fucking clueless. im not fine. im broken. and the only person that can fix me , is off making someone else happy.

i call an uber and wait outside.

SORRY THIS IS ANOTHER SHORT CHAPTER💞💞