The Macabre ➸ Psycho C.R.

《11》

Thank you so much for 1k, guys! Also, I've changed the cover...do you like it? Comment here to let me know bc I can always change it back. I was hella bored so experimented on the laptop :p
Prepare thyselves for 2000+ words of emotion..
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-Chandler-

A sharp breath passed through my lips as I slid the razor across my wrist for the sixth and final time.

Why stop now?

My jaw clenched as tears continued to brim in my eyes.

Hey? Why stop? What's the harm in inflicting a little pain on yourself when you've hurt so many other people?

"Stop it." I squeezed my eyes shut.

Why should I stop? You know it's the truth. You know you deserve it.

"I can't fucking live like this, you know."

What?

I stopped speaking out loud, remembering that people were downstairs.

One minute you're telling me that what I'm doing is good. Then you're making me feel like shit for it.

Is that really me though? Because...I mean I'm you, pretty much. So you're pinning the blame on yourself.

I threw the blade onto the floor in frustration, cutting my finger by accident as I did so.
My eyes glared at the white scars which ran up my left arm, stopping where my sleeves had been rolled up to, and how the blood oozed from the fresh cuts before dribbling it's way around my skin.

Leave me alone.

No.

Please. A tear fell out of my eye and landed on one of the cuts. I flinched and cringed as I felt a stinging sensation on my wrist as the tear mixed with the blood.

You should tell her.

Tell her what?

How you feel. What you think about...you can't deny that-

The only thing I fucking feel is you, destroying my mind.

As if it wasn't destroyed already.

One day, I'm going to get rid of you. One day, you're going to fucking leave me alone and have no say in the matter. One day, I'm going to be okay again without you constantly fucking me over.

I heard a knock on the door, cutting off my- our thoughts. "Chan?" Nathan called from the other side.

I cleared my throat and wiped my eyes, haphazardly pulling my shirt sleeve then jacket sleeve over my arm.
"Mhmm?" I replied.

"Are you okay, dude? You've been up here for almost half an hour."

"Yeah, I'm good...just got a crazy bad nose bleed." I lied, quickly picking up the blade and chucking it into the trash and covering it with tissue.

Nathan chuckled. "Well, that's karma on you for laughing at me when Darcie gave me a nose hemorrhage yesterday." I forced a small laugh in reply. "Well dinner's ready now, so you'd best not take too long. Nat'll get pissy."