Rebels At Heart

Chapter 18

Julie's POV

Im inside the school canteen alone. And I feel sad, just by looking at those lovely pairs around the corner eating together happily.. I missed Karl, we used to do that back then.. Our relationship wasn't that perfect, there were misunderstandings and all but still I wanted to have it back. If not because of my stupid good for nothing sister who so acted to know it all, my life shouldn't be this screwed. I still have my boyfriend with me and I dont feel like shit looking at every couple around..

Arrrggg!!!! I need to find Karl, I have to talk to him to settle things out. If I need to apolize in Jenna's behalf, I will. Shucksss! This is all your fault Jenna.. You are surely going to pay for this!!!

I grab my things and hurriedly left the canteen.. I started looking for Karl.. As I saw two of his classmates at the library, I approached them.

"Hey, Mia..do you know where I could find Karl?"

Mia immediately snap her gaze to her classmate beside her, I can see both are in doubt of something that I cant figured out.. they exchange glances as if they have some secrets they dont want to tell.

"I ahmm, I didn't see him around here. Maybe somewhere that he usually used to hang out to.."

"Okay, thanks.."

I didn't bother to figure out how weird they act. Maybe I just imagine things I shouldn't be.

As I about to turn around, something catches my attention.. or should I say someone? I can clearly see Karl's back from here even it was meters away from where Im standing. Its just a matter of a girlfriend....well, an ex-girlfriend rather.. to know that it was really him..

And its just his back that made my forehead crease in annoyance..and anger... its a girl's hand over it, hugging him. Well, if I guess it right, they are making out at the corner in the last shelf of books...

I've been told earlier that Karl wasn't in the library. So I guess thats what the weird exchange of glances was all about.

Wait... Im annoyed and mad? What on earth should I be? Dont I have the right to be? Because the fact that we are not together anymore should be a waking up call for me to realize that I shouldn't be feeling this way?

But I need some answers.. I need to talk to him if there's still a chance for us. Well, is there really a chance in the first place??

Arrrghhh!!!! why should I bother anyway? Clearly, he's been enjoying himself without me in his life..

I really dont know what to do right now.. Im so helpless!!!!

When I finally decided to rest my case and retreat, it was then that Karl turned around and spotted me obviously watching them..

I saw him smirking as he is heading right to my direction along with the girl.

"So Julie, did you enjoy the show you have been free watching a while ago?, he chucked and the girl beside him giggled.

I seethe in anger, as I eyed both of them.. The nerve! As if I really enjoy watching him with another girl. So what? Im hurt? Maybe. But I will never admit it infront of him, it will just booast his ego even more..

I hold my temper as he continue..
"Anyway, where's your little sissy? Has she gone for good after leaving you without a boyfriend? Thats so mean of her! Or did she intentionally plan it so you will never be happy with anyone just as herself? Owww what a sad life, losers!"

And here I thought, we can still have a chance together and we can bring back the old times.. What the heck! I dont want to be with such a good for nothing son of a bitch!

Jenna was right all along.. Yeah! How can I be so stupid having a boyfriend like him? How can I be more stupid not listening to my own sister?

"So what now Julie, did you enjoy the single blessedness?"..

Everyone in the library laughed at his remark.. The librarian reprimanded us to be quiet..

Im about to cry with the humiliation.. but I know if i will let my tears out, there will be more than humiliation to take.. and I have more than enough just for today..

"What? No words of wisdom? Well, how about goodbyes? We never got a chance to say it.. how about we'll start now? Ohhh dont tell me you are still inlove with me thats why you're here to... lets say rekindle?"

Yeah..it couldn't be any more true because it really was.. He was right! Thats the mere reason why Im here.. to have our second chance. How could I be more stupid than that? And how many times I called myself stupid as of this moment? Countless.. So most likely it could be true. .What a shame!

Another laugh was heard from the students who watch us amusingly as if we are some sort of a movie or something.. And a final warning from the librarian has been called out.

I stand my ground, and prepare my own piece of goodbye..

"So Karl, is this really what you want to say my goodbye? Well Karl here it is.. first I regret everything from knowing you, that days I've spent every precious time with you until the day I've realized how stupid I am to actually fall inlove with you.. I am still wondering how could I love someone who's been too self-centered..ego-maniac and a man-whore at the same time? But Im fully awake now from that nightmare.. thanks God! I couldn't be any more than relieved that finally I can free myself from that worst experience of my life. I cant say Im all regrets.. Im also thankful because it made me a better person and a stronger woman that I am now. And...." I glance around to see the students are eyeing me with adoration, with that I smile and continue. "I hope everyone should learn from this experience and choose someone to love who will value your worth more than anything else."

After the longest speech I've made with my entire life, I sigh in relief and walk away with dignity and self-respect intact.. I am so proud of myself.

But there's one thing that can make me more proud of myself. Its to settle things out with my little sister.

Its about time!