He's A Jerk, But He's Cute

"Octavian Wants To Marry Her"

(oh, there is such a special place in hell for people like Hunter (and me)

Third Person P.O.V.

Hunter would have to be deaf not to hear Devon's thundering steps coming down the hall. A few minutes earlier, Devon had called telling him something about Rachel throwing his clothes in the pool and then storming off so he'd practically been waiting for this.

"I don't understand why she hates me so much! It's you and Octavian who have been being assholes to her since fucking forever!" Devon slammed their dorm door shut behind him and tossed his soaked clothes on Hunter's bed.

Hunter lowered the volume of his laptop and gave Devon a quick glance. "Hello to you too, best friend." He went back to his business which was probably watching Buzzfeed instead of doing homework.

Devon groaned and plopped onto his bed. "Why must you torture every girl I like, man? First Annabeth, then Hannah who kicked your ass—"

"I especially enjoyed taking her virginity."

"And now Rachel. You don't even like the artsy girls!" Devon whined, all the anger in his body melting into the same feeling he had whenever Hunter did something obnoxious. He couldn't exactly dump his best friend that he'd known since he was 8, so he was learning to accept Hunter's terrible qualities.

Hunter closed his laptop and folded his arms. "Okay, Devon. It's time we hash this whole Rachel thing out. You wanna fuck her, Octavian wants to marry her, and I wanna know why the fuck you two even like her. I also want to make out with her again but that's not what's important." He wrung out Devon's shirt over the side of the bed and then towel-whipped him with it when he didn't respond.

Devon flipped over, barely wincing and flipped him off absently. "So... What I'm getting from this is that we all like her? "

Hunter shrugged and wiped his hands on his pants. "Nah, I don't really like her. I just like to see her pissed. "

"Why are you like this?" Devon truthfully didn't want an answer.

"Tears just turn me on, man." Hunter couldn't keep the sigh out of his voice.

"That's what therapists are for."

Hunter chuckled darkly. "Don't kinkshame me, Devon."

Devon rolled his eyes, got up, and sat down next to Hunter, careful to avoid the wet spot on his bed from the socks Rachel had thrown in the pool.

Truthfully, he had known Hunter was an absolute lunatic from the time he had caught him eating his pet goldfishes. And that was when he was 10. So Hunter's interest had developed from killing pets to other sadistic pleasures that crept into his social life. But it now it was leaking into Devon's own social life. And maybe Devon was the real lunatic for appeasing his appetite constantly.

He leaned into his friend and Hunter smirked and squeezed his shoulder.

"I don't understand why you dragged Octavian into our shit show."

Hunter looked down at him with his usual blown pupils; he'd been doing more lines lately. "He looked like he needed someone to take him under their wing. Not my fault he's following in my footsteps."

It was quiet for a second while the two seemed to slip into thought until Devon gripped Hunter's thigh harshly, though knowing Hunter, he probably enjoyed it. "Don't think," Devon warned," that I won't get rid of Octavian if he starts making things more difficult between Rachel and me. "

Hunter hummed knowingly and stroked the hand on his thigh. "I have nothing but faith in you. Besides, you know I love to watch a good fight. "