Our Little Secret {n.h}

chapter 1

4 years before

"This doesn't leave this room, got it?" I nodded, feeling my cheeks flush as I stepped into my jeans and buttoned them once up and over my hips.

"Got it." I mumbled and tugged my shirt on, trying to avoid looking over at the blonde boy who was pulling on his boxers. "Um, I guess I'll see you around." I stepped into my boots and finally looked over at Niall, seeing him looking bored as ever.

"Maybe." He shrugged and I swallowed hard, shoving my phone in my back pocket. "Our little secret, okay?"

"Yeah." I whispered and finally left the room, going back downstairs to find Louise.

I pushed through the sweaty bodies in the living room of the house we were in and stood on my tip toes, looking around to find the pink hair of my best friend. I spotted her after a minute and walked over, offering a small smile when she saw me. Louise tugged me over to her and frowned when she saw the expression on my face. I shook my head, tugging her to the kitchen to where it was quiet.

"Can we go?" I asked and Louise cocked her head to the side.

"Everything okay?" She wondered and I hesitated before shaking my head. "Yeah, we can go."

I thanked her and we left the house, going to her car. I climbed in the passenger seat and we drove off, me keeping quiet. Like normal. I kept my gaze out the window and once outside of my house, I told Louise goodbye and got out, tugging my sweater closer to my stomach. I unlocked the front door and pushed my way inside, noticing Jake sitting in the living room, watching something on TV.

"Hey, Ari." He said, not taking his eyes off the screen.

"I'm going to bed." I said, tightening my grip on my bag that was hanging from my shoulder.

"I'm working late tomorrow so I'll leave money for you for dinner." Jake said, finally looking over at me. "You okay? You look pale."

"Um, yeah." I stumbled over my words and Jake cocked an eyebrow. "I'll see you in the morning."

I quickly escaped without further questioning and jogged up the stairs to my room, locking the door behind me. I finally took a deep breath that I didn't know I was holding in and leaned my head back against the door. I dropped my bag to the floor and tossed my jacket onto my desk chair. Walking over to my bed, I kicked my boots off on the way. I sat down and leaned back, groaning to myself. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

I got up and went to the bathroom, wanting to get the smell of vodka off of my body. I shut the door behind me and turned the hot water on, taking my jeans off a moment after. Once my sweater was on the floor, I looked in the mirror. My eyes widened at the amount of bruises on my body and on my hips, about six or seven in the shape of a 'N.' I stripped off my bra and underwear, stepping into the shower after a moment.

I let my dark hair get wet under the stream of water and I ran my fingers through it, getting some tangles out. I shampooed and conditioned it, watching the suds go down the drain. After my body was washed and everything shaved, I turned the water off and got out, wrapping a towel around my body. I wiped the steam from the mirror and cringed at the sight of my running makeup that I had forgotten to take off before I got in the shower. I brushed through my long hair and wiped my face off before going back to my room.

I found some shorts and a t-shirt along with a fresh pair of underwear. I slid them up my legs, wincing in pain from the soreness between my thighs, and put on the clothes, running the towel through my hair. I used the toilet and brushed my teeth, turning the bathroom light off. Once in the safety of my room, I plugged my phone up and got my headphones before climbing into bed. I turned the lamp off and let the darkness envelope me under the covers.

New Message from: Louise

You alright?

You seemed a bit shaken up.

To: Louise

Yeah, just didn't feel up to partying tonight. Sorry.

I replied to Louise's text and she replied with a goodnight so I exited the messages app and went to Twitter, scrolling through the posts. After checking all social media, I put on some music and put my phone under my pillow, flipping over onto my back to stare up at the ceiling and out the sky light. I watched a plane go by in the sky and I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath.

Thoughts about tonight filled my mind and I threw a pillow over my face, groaning. I cannot believe I did what I did. Two shots of cherry flavored vodka and I have the courage of a lion. God, he probably thinks I'm pathetic. I think I'm pathetic. I mean, I never would have said one word to Niall if I were sober. I told Louise to not let me drink, knowing how I get.

The minute he started dancing with me, I was drawn in. With the accent and smile and blonde hair, Niall was hard to resist. Once he had turned me around and suggested we go upstairs, I couldn't say no. He was hott and we were slightly tipsy so I went and we started making out in an empty room. He had asked me if I was a virgin and when I nodded, he assured me that he would take good care of me. Boy, did he take good care of me.

A small smile curved my lips at the thought of his lips on mine and everywhere else. Feeling my cheeks heat up at my thoughts, I shook my head and turned over in bed to look out the window. I know some people probably think it's weird to not have shades, but I like to look outside at night. My eyes began to droop and I finally closed them, falling asleep with blue eyes on my mind.