He's taken, I'm broken (Louis Tomlinson)

Chapter 32

"What?" My voice came out in a strained whisper.

"I'm really sorry. I tried to do everything I was capable of. I'm glad he didn't lose his life. If you had even been a second late I don't know what would have happened." The doctor said in a sympathetic voice.

"What? What do you mean? There must be something you can do. Anything. You have to something. What kind of a doctor are you if you can't do anything." I was aware of the fact that people were stopping to stare at me but I didn't care. Louis would hate me. He would never talk to me. This was my fault. I had to make it alright. And if this was how I had to do it then I would. "Why are you a doctor if you can't make him alright. If you don't know what to do. You-"

"Miss I did everything I could. I'm really sorry."

"No. You're not fucking sorry. Why would you care. You don't even know him. If you were sorry then you would try to-"

"Lauren, calm down." I was cut off by Liam.

"No Liam. I cant calm down. Can you hear what he's saying. He said that Louis is... that he can't have...." I couldn't even bring myself to say it out loud. I had started sobbing again.

Liam patted my back. "It's okay. Don't cry." He whispered soothingly.

"No Liam, don't you see? This is my fault. I should have been in there. Not Louis. This happened because of me. Louis will never talk to me. He's going to hate me."

"Lauren, no!" He sounded horrified. "This is not your fault. Don't you dare think that this happened because of you. And Louis could never hate you. You know that."

"No. No I don't Liam." I looked around. The doctor had left.

"Lauren, please. Don't blame yourself. It's not your fault."

I nodded even thought I still knew that it was my fault. I knew arguing with Liam wouldn't get me anywhere because he was really stubborn and always stood his ground.

"I need to go to the washroom." I muttered not meeting his gaze.

When I reached the washrooms I immediately went to look at myself in the mirror. I already knew I looked a state so I wasn't surprised when I saw what a mess I was in. My hair looked like a bird's nest and my eyes were red rimmed from all the crying and my face was flushed too. My nose looked like a tomato. My nose always turned red if I cried. I washed my face but I was still crying so I knew it wouldn't really help. I tried to straighten my hair with my hands and tied it in a bun. I really didn't care what I looked like right now. I splashed water on my face once again before walking out of the door. I kept my eyes on the floor not looking where I was going.

"Lauren!" I turned around when I heard Eleanor's voice. She had just come out of the washroom.

Hmm. She hadn't been there when I was inside. She must've been inside a stall.

"What?"

She came to stand in front if me before speaking. "I'm really sorry. This is my fault. I realized that Louis still loved you but I still held onto him. I should've backed off. If I had then this wouldn't have happened. He loves you so much. More than me. I'm sorry. I'll back off now."

What the fuck. I suddenly felt angry. Was she saying that she would back off because of what the doctor had said. I couldn't believe it.

"I can't believe it." I looked at her with disgust.

"What? What's wrong?"

"You're saying this because of what happened right. Because of what the doctor said. I can't believe it."