Heart of Two (HUNHAN)

I want him.

Baek was standing in the middle of the door when Sehun opened his front door to his house that night.
He tried to get past Baek but the older boy wasn't going to move. He seemed determined to talk.

"What are you doing Baek?"
Sehun whispered as he continued looking at the ground. He couldn't bear to look into Baek's eyes. Not yet.

"I want to talk. With you."
Baek whispered back, as if trying to do it slow with Sehun's pace.

Sehun hesitated. He wasn't sure if he was ready but he couldn't take it longer anymore.

"You can't keep avoiding you know."
Baek said again.

"Okay."
Sehun said and Baek immediately turned to walk upstairs to Sehun's bedroom. Sehun walked quietly behind him.

"So.."
Sehun said as he closed his door shut with a gentle bang with his hand at the back.

"Im really sorry about last time. I have thought.. for a long time. And I figured, maybe what it seems like ..is-"

"Just how it looks like?"
Sehun cut in, startling Baek a little bit.
But he regained himself as Sehun continued staring at him with a poker face.

"Look.. I-"

"Don't look so sorry. It wasn't like I've never hurt you before."
Sehun said with a pained espression as he turned to look away with his eyebrows scrunched.

Baek took a deep breath.
"You're still seeing Luhan. "
It came out more of a statement than a question.

Sehun maintaining his silence had proved that Baek was right.
"Then.."
Baek sighed. He didn't know how to do this. He thought he was ready to hear it. But apparently he still felt pain in his heart. And Sehun wasn't helping either.

"Look Baek. I knew. The way you stared at Chanyeol. You liked him. I had known you for years to know that look that you used to have on me. Used to ,Baek."
Sehun said as he took another breath.

"If ..If you do really like him. Then let yourself go. Im not your family. It's not like we were suppose to stick together with a contract. Just.. Im telling you it's okay to do it."

Baek looked up at Sehun as his eyes filled up with tears.
"It's okay to break up? After so many years?"
He whispered and he hoped that only himself heard it.

"Yeah."
Sehun whispered back.

A moment of silence dreaded them as they listened to each other's heavy breathing.
"Are we breaking up now?"

"If you want to."

Baek let out a small laugh as he said.
"If I want to? You're thinking about me now?"

"I always did. "
Sehun breathed out.
And Baekhyun realized that it was probably right.

Looking at Sehun's skinny frame nowadays, Baek realized he didn't even care if he ate enough or if he skipped meals. He realized, since when did he not cared more about Sehun.
He had selfishly tied him to himself and constantly complained for not enough time with him.
He regretted it.

Baek finally looked up and held out his arms to bring Sehun in for a hug without letting the other protest.
He let his tears shamelessly soaked Sehun's suit as he breathed out.
"I-... I want to. But I'll miss you."

He heard Sehun took in a sharp breath.
"And there'll always be a space for you in the depth of my heart. You'll be my number one best friend. Okay?"

Baek felt arms holding his own body tightly as Sehun's voice shakingly spoke.

"Okay."

"I wish you the best. No hard feelings?"

"Nope."

And they both lightly smiled as tears splashed onto their clothes. Not even sure if it's the tears of relief or heartbroken.

It would be somthing hard to let go.
Cause memories would never be wiped away from their minds.
Now finally they would not rely on each other anymore.

Now that they could love who they really wanted.

***
When Chanyeol eyed Baek exiting Sehun's bedroom with his puffy cheeks and red eyes, he wasn't sure what to guess. He could only stare hard as Baek walked downstairs with wobbly legs.

He hoped that Baek would look at him as he walked to the bottom of the stairs.
And he did.

Chanyeol was taken aback with how relax Baekhyun looked. Like the weight on his shoulders finally lifted off after so long.
And... Baek was smiling at him.
Actually smiling with his lips slightly curved up.

Chanyeol froze. He wasn't sure what to do. Was he even smiling at him? Or is there someone else behind him.
He wasn't even sure what the heck he was thinking when he looked back to check, earning a chuckle from Baekhyun, making Chan burned up from his neck to his cheeks.

How embarrasing.

Baekhyun smiled again as he gestured to the sofa in the living room with Titanic on the tv. Only just a bit halfway through.

But Chanyeol didn't care.
All he cared was that Baekhyun was inviting him to cuddle on the sofa with him.

Cuddle as Chanyeol selfishly put it.
Hoping.

And Chanyeol shamelessly stood up and followed him.