The Bad Social Romance

Chapter 2: Handling the situation

I drove home in the pouring rain, my vision blurred as tears threatened to fall. Suppressing the need to drive to Ben's house and tell him off, I turned at the curb and parked in front of my house. All the lights were on and laughter erupted from inside. I backed away to check I was in the right street. 

Laughter? The loss of electricty? This was nothing like my parents. They would never laugh unless they had to, they were always very serious about everything. They never even had a second to check how I was doing. That's how they were, I gues you just have to accept who they are. My parents needed to save money so they cut down anything we didn't need. Water, electricity and the usage of the telephone. At least I got the internet to keep me company. 

"What are you doing out there?" My father flashed a plastic smile and invited me in. He was standing behind the front door with it slightly ajar, letting light stream out and form a parallelogram on the driveway. I wiped away the tears and put on the best smile I could handle. Clutching my purse close to me, hoping it would be a shield from all the bad things in the world, I stomped up the steps to our porch and squinted as my eyes adjusted to the brightness of my home. 

Every single light was turned on making the house seem more open. I was surprised to see the walls were white when all my life I thought they were beige or brown. I peeped into the dining room and saw my mother bringing out a big platter of lobster and place it on the table next to the stuffed chicken and mashed potatoes. She smoothened the back of her dress as she sat down.

"Hey honey! Do you remember the Gerkins? Remember Nicolas? You guys used to play around in the front yard together?" my mother motioned to the guy sitting next to his parents in the button-up white shirt with jeans. He looked like a model with his gigantic muscles and strong jaw and high cheekbones, absolute perfection. 

 "Yeah, I think I remember, " I whispered. 

"So," my mother continued, avoiding any awkward silences. "Nicolas, I heard you were moving back? What school are planning on going to?" 

"West High," 

"Oh, that's the high school my daughter attends. Isn't it honey?" I nodded. I took the seat next to Nicolas. As far away from my parents as possible. I gave him a small smile and turned back to my food. 

After dinner, just as they were about to leave, Nicolas whispered, "Bedroom window," into my ear. Fuck. 

*      *      *

I waited. And waited. He never came. Nicolas that bastard. 

I was awake the whole night. THE WHOLE NIGHT! I couldn't get a wink of rest. 

The following morning, there was a note on my bedroom window. 

Wherever you are, it said. 

My knees buckled underneath me and I sank to the cold wooden floor of my bedroom. My mother screamed my name from the bottom of the stairs. I didn't move. How could I move? I was terrified. I need to-

"What the hell Kayley? I cooked for you! Come down right now you ungrateful little-" Mother stared at me for quite a long time. She knelt down beside me and I crumpled the little piece of paper in my hand. I wouldn't let her find it. Lord knows what she would do. 

We had problems before and adding this to the pile would make things worse, for me. 

"What's wrong honey?" she feigned sympathy. The neighbors were probably watching. They are always watching. Sometimes they would invite themselves over just to make sure I was still alive and breathing.

Once my mother thought they were too busy to pay any attention to us, she pulled me to my feet and slapped my face. Her hand left a stinging sensation on my cheek. I was still able to feel it as I boarded the bus. I sat at the back, alone, I was like a virus. People stared as I opened the little paper and held it in my hands. I was shaking so hard. I read it over and over again, the more times I read it the more I felt vulnerable. Vulnerability is something I can't handle. It's something I can't afford to feel.

Wherever you are, I will be watching.