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Chapter 6: The Quitters

I PICKED MY favorite denim jacket and put it on; I was wearing the 'I'm sleeping with the lead singer' shirt that Matt gave me a few months before. The joke never got old, and it made me smile every time I wore it.

"Ready, kid?" Matt leaned on the bathroom door frame. He was wearing a 1975 Rolling Stones' Tour t-shirt that was loose but still couldn't hide his muscular chest and biceps.

I smiled looking at him through the mirror while applying lip gloss, "Ready!"

He grabbed my hand and looked at me from head to toe, "You are ridiculously beautiful." I blushed, smiled, and kissed him.

It was a crisp January night, and we were heading to the gig Matt had with his band. We walked out of my apartment holding hands. That past week he had been staying every night there, and I was wondering if it wasn't about time that we consider moving in together.

We arrived at the venue, and the band was already there waiting for the sound check. I grabbed a beer and sat next to Gabby, the drummer's girlfriend, with whom I had become pretty close those past months. The band was a hobby Matt was very fond of, and I enjoyed the gig nights.

"I've got the 'I'm banging the drummer' shirt," she said laughing after reading my shirt's stamp.

Soon after, the bar was crowded. The fact that he was a famous actor attracted more audience than a regular experimental indie band would. I remained close to the stage, I knew all of their songs and was singing them out loud.

"Thanks for coming everyone!," Matt yelled, "Hope you are enjoying both the beer and our show, make sure you enjoy it in that order! I want to take a moment to talk to my beautiful girlfriend who is here tonight!"The people in the bar yelled, whistled and clapped their hands, I blushed and beamed back at him.

"She is not only putting up with me, but she even managed to learn all of our songs," he continued, "A year ago today I saw her across a bar like this one for the first time, and my life changed forever. So, keep your eyes open tonight, you might get as lucky as me! I wrote the next song for her that same night, I love you, kid!"

The chords of their song ' It's You' started and my heart was beating faster than ever.

"Ladies and gentlemen, we have just been cleared to land at the LAX airport. Please make sure one last time your seatbelt is securely fastened," the flight attendant announcement brought me back to the present.

Jake squeezed my arm, "Are you okay?"I nodded and looked through the window as the plane was descending.

The L.A movie premiere was that same night, so Jake, Steve and I were arriving in the first flight to have time to arrange everything before it. The week before that had been exhausting for me. We had the New York premiere, interviews that included the press insisting in asking me about Harry, a rumor that grew stronger when Matt was missing from the red carpet. A hard week was awaiting with a similar schedule but in L.A. And, of course, I was reuniting with Matt and that made me very anxious.

I arrived with our driver, Charlie, at the house Matt and I owned in Studio City. As I opened the door, Charlie brought my suitcase in, and politely said goodbye before leaving.

After closing the door, I walked inside."Hello?," my voice echoed in the hallway, Matt's car was parked outside, so I assumed he was there.

As I approached the sitting area, the sound of the TV became clearer. I entered the room and found Matt on the couch watching what seemed like an award ceremony. I stood behind him. It took me a few seconds until I realized it was from three years ago when I won a Golden Globe. I saw myself on the screen going on stage, receiving the award with tears in my eyes and beginning my acceptance speech."... to my family, thank you for your support. And last but definitely not least, Matt," the camera focused on him, his eyes were filled with tears of joy and pride, "I love you, baby, I wouldn't be here without you, you are my rock," I said before leaving the stage. My stomach tightened and the tears blurred my vision.

"How  did we even reach this point, Liv?" Matt asked breaking the silence, his eyes still on the screen.

"I don't know..." I shook my head staring at the floor.

"He likes you...that boy, I could tell at the after-party by how he looked at you," he nodded.

"Matt... he's just a boy being a boy," I whispered.

"Did anything happen between you two?"  I could tell he didn't want to know the answer.

"Of course not..."

We remained silent for a few minutes until I had the courage to sit beside him. His elbows were resting on top of his thighs, his hands intertwined and his head still down.

"I'm tired Matt...I'm tired of being mad at you, of being frustrated, of feeling left out," I admitted quietly.

"Why don't we give it a shot and try to make this work?" He suggested weakly.

"When are we gonna get married? You know, if we're making this work we should start planning that wedding already. It's been two years now since you proposed, and we hardly ever mention it.  Sometimes I forget we are engaged," I felt sorry for saying it, but was trying to make a point.

"We've just been busy Liv."

"Exactly, we've just been too busy to take care about our relationship Matt. And now I think we are worlds apart. You were my best friend, and lately, it feels like I don't even know you anymore."

"What do you think we should do then?" He finally faced me.

"I mean if you're even questioning what to do it's pretty obvious where we are standing, right?" My voice broke.

Matt nodded. There wasn't much more to say, and we both knew it. Staying in a relationship we no longer cared enough about would only make things worse. We hugged for what seemed like an eternity.

"You should stay in the Brooklyn house, it's all you in there anyway," he sighed, "I will move here, I guess New York only made sense to me because you were there..."

I couldn't hold the tears anymore, and they began to roll down my cheeks slowly. That house was the place we dreamed together, and now that dream was over.

Matt took my hand, "We did really good Kid...we had great years together" he whispered in my ear holding me tight, "I'll be here for you forever no matter what, you know that right?" he said, placing a kiss on the top of my head.

I nodded while trying to clear the tears from my eyes. Words were failing me.

"If you don't mind, I still want to go to your premiere tonight," Matt muttered.

I nodded, "Of course."

*

THE CAR STOPPED in front of the red carpet. Matt buttoned his suit jacket, opened the door, and climbed out of the car. He ducked his head and looked at me. I was wearing a short black dress and my hair down.

"Are you ready?" he asked.

I nodded, my hands were shaking. He stretched his arm and grabbed my hand tightly to help me out. We both walked holding hands and stopped in front of the movie banner.

"Closer! Kiss! This way!" the photographers yelled.

We looked at each other; Matt grabbed me by the waist me closer to his body. I rested my head on his chest and looked up at him. He placed a kiss on my forehead and smiled.

"You'll be awesome, kid," he whispered before facing the cameras and smiling.